you are born in a given family and are of from previous generations of it - your grand parents and parents.
if you know many things that the parents ad grand parents, aunts and uncles, do wrong or are wrong in their way of thinking about, demanding unreasonable things, how do you reason with them or do you walk away eventually?
yes, at times, unfortunately, mostly, it is absolutely real and ugly that cultural wrongs have the better of them.
also, in case of immigrant families, who have not settled well yet, the over-load on the already depressed family and its younger members, as well as the parents’ fears and unreal doubts, can be over-whelming.
but does that mean, as a young child of 20 - 40, you cant change it for the better?
please keep aside the religious respecting of elders/parents ideal. that is true and no one can contest that. go around it and come to the logic of being fair and asking fair attitude and demands, not undeserving guilt trips and whimsical disparaging or down grading showdowns.
Re: correcting thinking or mentality your older generations
well.....when kids we used to just do wht we were being told...but now.....we ask for reasoning...& alhumdulillah.....they do convince us most of the times.....& when they don't ..i simply tell my dad..k main apke baat sey sehmat naheen hoon..magar aap meyrey abbu hain..toh i will listen & do wht u r saying...:)
Re: correcting thinking or mentality your older generations
It is very difficult to convince especially the women from our previous generation once they cross 60 years of age. Just forget it. They have been raised to think that old age means you are not supposed to change anymore .... a most popular phrase ... ub burhhapay mein kiya badlain ge and another where all reason just hits a brick wall when you tell them they are wrong about something ... poori umar guzar gai, ub hamain sumjhanay chalay hain ...
The day you stop learning is the day you become literally old. Our desi old generation accepts their old age even before it is there.
Re: correcting thinking or mentality your older generations
could it be that the parents' generation and them as a couple, are scared to change?
if that is true, how can oung adult children, gradually but effectively enable parents to appreciate and see for themselves, that with change, things can be done better?
Re: correcting thinking or mentality your older generations
guys as far as i have noticed is that undortunately in our culture most of the ppl listen to their parents blindly without seeing right or wrong sometimes outta respect and sometimes apnay parents kee naak na katwaanay key liye so when they grow up and have children they expect the same thing off their children may it be right or wrong and the cycle goes on, this cycle has been there for generations and each generation at some point or the other questions it aswell.
