Controlled crying or cry it out

somegroovychick · June 2, 2012, 9:50pm

Re: Controlled crying or cry it out

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When I was researching this approach, I did come across this argument a lot but honestly the baby isn’t in a stressful situation if he is fed, dry and comfortable. Baby just wants to be rocked to sleep and it’s just a habit he has become accustomed to. Also if an adult or even a 5 yr old is crying and the parents don’t attend to him, the kid would still be upset the next morning. With a baby, all is forgotten the next morning and they are delighted to see you. Babies work differently. The truth of the matter is different approaches work for different people. A good friend of mine is doing her fellowship and her one yr old went through terrible sleep regression. She has a very demanding job and she couldn’t get up every 2 hours to rock her to sleep. Moreover, her baby would get up at 5 everyday and refuse to go back to sleep and she needed to leave for work at 7. She used this approach and both mom and baby are very happy now.

I know this approach works and it doesn’t harm the baby and all the sleep experts like Ferber etc. are strong advocates but I am still reluctant to use it because it is terribly terribly terribly hard to watch your little munchkin cry.

the thing is, babies don’t cry just because. so maybe they’re not in physical distress but obviously mentally they’re not happy. i just couldn’t bring myself to do it. plus, its not a matter of only 45 minutes. once you commit, it doesn’t matter if it takes 2 hours, 3 hours or more- you have to leave them in there. if you go get them before they “self-soothe”, then you’ve just put them- and yourself- through a distressing time for nothing because they’ll know if they cry hard enough, you’ll get them. i couldn’t do that. maybe i’m not strong enough? but yes, you’re right- different strokes for different folks.

i suppose, like your friend, if a parent has no choice because of other commitments, then you suck it up and do it. but if you’re not in that situation, then i don’t understand the rush.