on many levels, people are related to their identity: ethnic, faith based, geographic, causal, national, professional, and gender wise.
in your observation, what are the ways in which people can have a constructive relationship with their identities?
we all have and share multiple distinct roles, and we have to switch our ways of being, to do justice with each one of these roles. in this context, how can people adapt a fair balance between who they are and what is their role?
on many levels, people are related to their identity: ethnic, faith based, geographic, causal, national, professional, and gender wise.
in your observation, what are the ways in which people can have a constructive relationship with their identities?
we all have and share multiple distinct roles, and we have to switch our ways of being, to do justice with each one of these roles. in this context, how can people adapt a fair balance between who they are and what is their role?
share your thoughts on this, if you like.
best,
Dushwari
I dont have any issue with regard to being multi-cultured. I swith from one cultura context to another without facing any major issues. I think the main focus should be on balance. For me, my religion has been important and given me strength and balance.
I dont live a traditional pakistani life nor a typical Western life. I am happy with my balanced values and my focus on life.
But I must admit that if I am in a typical pakistan auntie crowd I tend to get allergic and cant really deal with them. I panick when ppl start doing their chalaakiyaan (maybe u have noticed my panic attacks when my SIl did this)..anyways i feel that I have become stronger now but still I cant really manage the aunty type crowd. its too far from my identity...
Ideally, you shouldn’t have to (radically) change your ‘way of being’ when you switch to a different role, because having to do that implies that your roles are either in conflict with each other or your core personality.
I found I had to adapt a fair bit. Say work environment and then at home, living in a multi cultural country and in a multi religious family. There has to be something like you maintain your separate charachteristic, but yet assimilate into your environment....takes plenty tolerance. Yes your core personality has to not be stretched too much or else you may be shattered.
Somehow I think men dont have to change too much with their different states of being. Perhaps I am wrong?
thanks everybody. alysam you made an excellent point. adaptation is better and as everybody said, the core should not be changed.
unless one is severely wrong and is hurting oneself or others.
i would extend the argument of tolerence to acceptance.
i feel that we need to accept than simply half heartedly tolerate.
when something is genuinely validated and heard or responded to, then there is a better chance to even undo what one does wrongfully.
but when people have unsure personalities, and make alibis or succumb to their limitations, they remain in denials to their own disadvantage.
they are afraid o reach out to others. and they dont and cant build nor keep trust.
they are afraid and while they relfect their insecurities on others, they also distance themselves from happiness.
even when u try to help someone out of their biases, narrow minded ness or doubts, they dont accept that u are sincere to them and patient.
infact, they blame u for being persistent. because all they are wraped in is their limited thinking.
it hurts very much when u see it coming from those who u allowed to rely on u for emotional comfort. and they poke holes and make it ragged - that trust that u make them capable of.
be it age difference, geographic, national, creed, gender or faith based, as long as a person is decent and fair, even if change happens it will happen for the better and not for the worse.
and that is what we should look for and this is the kind of effect we should have on each other as individuals and as members of communities and societies.