Re: confused..........
Brother Kaun, forgive me for what I am going to say, but that is in no way intended to judge you but to tell you the fact (in my sincere opinion). You might be suffering from something which even an ordinary person like me can suffer from, even repeatedly at different stages of life. It can happen to anyone. It is weakness of "Imaan".
When "Imaan"(Faith) is weakened, irrelevant people take place in our heart more then they should. A strong "Imaan" gives us an ability to easily remove all the irrelevant girls from our mind and heart and only love our wife more than anyone else not because of anything else but because she is our wife, even if she does not posses some of the qualities we want and are present in girls not related to us.
You are not going through an abnormal situation. You are a lot better than me, even a person of below medium character like me can also suffer from it. The ONLY solution is to increase Dikr (remembrance) of Allah (s.w.t), practice with full sincerity our religious duties, family and job responsibilities and all the other things we are responsible for. When you let the necessary things in your life to speak, the unnecessary would vanish itself. The unnecessary bother us when we are siting idle and not give time to the necessary.
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After she has married, her thoughts are satanic for you, because she is forbidden for you now, according to any religion. If you want to remove this pollution from your mind, heart and soul, treat it with the remembrance of SOMEONE whose remembrance purifies everything. We all knows who this "SOMEONE" is.
**May Allah (s.w.t) bless us with the wisdom and strength to follow the path which HE wants us to follow.