Re: coil? or something else…
my poor husband. no hes not lazy ot whatever. i wanted 2 in 2 years. and i, alhumduililah have. but now i dont want any for a few years. he said he will take care of his side and wear it, but its not better than the coil is it? or even pills.
Re: coil? or something else....
use all of em... coil.. pill.. condoms... no chance of babies!
i would personally never opt for anything internal in this regard unless absolutely necessary. if he is saying he will take care of it... let him. if u dont like it.. go from there.
bekaar mein acha bhala dhagaa zayaa kerdiya nadzzz... there was never an issue.
Re: coil? or something else....
Peace nadz123
There is something called the femidom or diaphragm which is like a condom for females, but hard to apply this.. Also align condom usage with your natural cycle ... Just before period and just after are the least fertile times ... This is called the rhythm method ... And there is always coitus interruptus, but this will not be fair for you as it does not maximise your pleasure ...
Re: coil? or something else…
Re: coil? or something else…
Re: coil? or something else....
well if she was really bothered, she would have taken care of it. obviously her husband is not going to be that bothered, he's not the one it's going to effect. so no surprise she wants to take control of it now.
lots of people don't like condoms.
how does the husband not get affected by kids?!
Re: coil? or something else…
ohuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu, can people stick to topic, and stop worrying about wether my husband will be or wont be affected by a kid we havent had yet.
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how does the husband not get affected by kids?!
Some men don't mind having kids or more kids at all. :D
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^ then that should be stated rather than saying husbands couldnt careless.
Husbands with responsibility definately care... and it affects them just as much as it does women... but in different ways.
Apologies nadz... this wasnt aimed at your hubby
Re: coil? or something else....
is he carrying it around? does he have to give birth?
from what i've observed with my cousins who've married guys from Pak; depending on upbringing/education, many don't know about women's issues, all they know is that their spouse should get pregnant and have a kid within a year and keep going. after all, that's what their mother's did, didn't they? changing nappies, feeding?! you can forget that, imagine if his mum found out!
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prolly gonna get flamed but whatever. i made my first post in context. i don't think i was wrong.
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just before i go pak permanently...would be different if i was here.
oh btw, since when are you going back permanently? what happened to coming back after a few years?
did i miss a thread??
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perm- as in for the time being. i cant run back if my coil isnt agreeing with me......
Re: coil? or something else....
seriously, Pakistan is not so backward if you don't want it to be. even lower middle-class women have the coil fitted, they must be tended to. given that you can afford much better medical care, it's just a matter of opening your mind and going out there and finding a decent doc with a decent set-up.
if you say he doesn't have a problem using condoms, then why not just start with that and go from there. the issues with them are more to do with forgetting to have one and going ahead anyway. in the rare case it breaks, you can take emergency contraception.
Re: coil? or something else....
is he carrying it around? does he have to give birth?
from what i've observed with my cousins who've married guys from Pak; depending on upbringing/education, many don't know about women's issues, all they know is that their spouse should get pregnant and have a kid within a year and keep going. after all, that's what their mother's did, didn't they? changing nappies, feeding?! you can forget that, imagine if his mum found out!
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prolly gonna get flamed but whatever. i made my first post in context. i don't think i was wrong.
So who feeds, clothes, schools these kids? Men worry bout this especially these days with the prices of things sky rocketing!
Im sure its an exaggeration on ure part cuz unless your cousins have a kid for every yr of marriage and are still in production (god help the ones married for 10 yrs and having 10 kids!! )...your theory doesnt hold.
My family back home isnt very well educated....but no one has more than 4 kids ...have been married for over 20 yrs... They dont have 20 kids... So SOMETHING must have been done right?
Just like u said... Pakistan can be whatever u want it to be...uneducated and illiterate on this matter....or the opp.
But saying men dont give a hoot bout making babies every yr? Pls.
And its their second... Like she said.... They wanted 2 close together. They did. Says nothing bout them being lazy with protection.
Now he is saying he will take care of it by using condoms... She wants info for other things... Doesnt look like he doesnt give a damn bout babies and oh its her problem not mine
My 2 cents :)
Re: coil? or something else…
sadzz and khawateen,
My bad for entering the wrong territory. 
steps away from Parenting forum
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It's less about childbirth than it is about bedroom dynamics .... :)
Sometimes when the heat is on either or both partners can easily skip the "wait have you worn protection" part of the process ... Sometimes this type of consideration takes the energy and passion out of love making - the instincts are on overdrive and people end up "getting it on" without thinking too much of the after effects ... Don't blame the hubby about this ... Remember that famous hadith ... "You can do as you wish ... but know that it is Allah (SWT) Who gives life ..." as a result there is no method of temporary contraception that is 100% guaranteed and when or if the news of another child comes - then as a couple people should embrace that as a gift from Allah (SWT) ...
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Re: coil? or something else…
with the amount of threads nadz has opened, i thought we were all au fait with her life. i distinctly remember her being surprised and unprepared when finding out she was pregnant for the second time. but it’s not like our nadz to backtrack on her words :halo: (< in case my sarcasm is once again missed).
babies first, contraception later. don’t want the neighbours thinking the wife is infertile now do we?!
i am old enough, ugly enough and with a big enough family to have heard it all. from the mother who married her daughter off to live in Pak when she was 19 and telling her ‘not to do anything and let nature take it’s course’. she had 2 in 2 years as well but complications with the second meant she almost died. mother is all ‘why didn’t you do anything to stop it, what was the hurry for the second!’, daughter is ‘…’.
to the husbands that come over with education that won’t get them a decent job here, live in their in-laws house being supported by their wives and her parents, but are not ready to hear about contraception because their family start asking for ‘khush khabri’ when barely a month has passed.
i do wonder who is financially supporting nadz all this time she’s been back with her parents? or who was supporting her the first time around when her husband was trying to settle here but decided it wasn’t working out and that they should go back to Pak? or who was then supporting her when they went back to Pak and he was trying to re-settle there?
so i refer you back to my earlier post. if she is bothered, she needs to handle it. i don’t feel good dissecting to such a level but as i said before, i’m not pulling my opinions out of my butt. not everyone has a hunky dory, mutual consideration partnership.
Re: coil? or something else....
Nadz speak to your doctor. We're not experts.
The only thing i would say is that even the coil isn't 100% effective. My friend got pregnant even while she had one fitted, so to me, I don't find that too brilliant.