I agree. I was in the city for majority of my childhood but then we moved to the burbs for the schools.
I think the attitude problem comes from multiple places:
When I was working in the city, I had to be a little mean because people approach you all the time for money, your number, etc. It happens and if you're too friendly...you attract the wrong kind of attention. After a while of doing that, it just becomes second nature and you do it almost unknowingly.
Rush. People in the who work 9 to 5 jobs dont have the same leisurely attitude towards life as people who dont. Those jobs are more in number in bigger cities. When you're rushing to get to work, you dont care if you offend someone in the process.
Technology, fashion, etc is primarily in bigger cities like NYC and Chicago so that is where you will find more people working tighter schedules, stressful jobs, etc.
Location. Go to the South and you will find people who will have you for tea if you simply asked for directions to the local supermarket. People in the Northern states arent like that for the above reasons.
I moved within the Midwest to a smaller metro area from Chicago and was amazed that everyone smiles at you and says hi! Something that i did not see in Chicago. Some of it is attributed to the difference in life structures like Sara and Mama pointed out.
I think people usually use attitude to make themselves a part of what they think is a 'norm' - its sad but its true - however, there are tonz of nice people too but i think we remember those with the attitude more than those who dont have any just because we cant understand why they couldnt hold the door open for me or say excuse me while shoving me into the window of the store on the sidewalk!
i know for a fact that some people in NYC find it weird if i hold a door open for them if theyre behind me..
^ I dont.... i try to open the door when i can but sometimes im in a rush or in a really pissy mood, so i don't.or when i see ppl struggling with groceries etc, ill hold the door open for them..
one of my friends, u will not believe, she talks to EVERYONE..she's so bubbly and nice. and i' get SO annoyed at her sometimes..im always the sarrial looking one next ot her lol.
hubby once helped a lady carry her groceries home, another one carry her stuff up the stairs on the subway cz she was having trouble breathing. (then again he's canadian :))
ok...I worked in NYC for over a decade and I lived in manhattan in my own little apartment for a year and a half.
Yup, theres attitude. LOTS of it. But its kind of justified...you catch the eye of a stranger in a subway and they take it as an invite to assault you. You try to get a seat on the subway while pregnant or wearing a cast (on two feet!!) and you get pushed and shoved out of the way. I could go on and on here,,,when you live in any big city, esp when you're a gal and on your own, you NEED attitude or you just wont survive.
As for work "attitude"...if you're driven, if you show up early and leave late, do your job in a spectacular fashion...then you'll get ahead. If you moan and groan about being a gal, about womens rights yadayada...you'll hit the glass ceiling. If you're spouting off about the unfairness of the planet then you aint doing the job you were hired to do. Ive seen this so many countless times - both the get-ahead types and the complainer/whiner types and it never ever failed...the workers got ahead, the whiners hit the glass ceiling and got shelved.
City life is lean and mean for sure. And you NEED attitude if you want to live in one.
completely agree. but it rather depends on who u meet and where. ive come across a lot of nice strangers even on the subway! men that would get off the seat and ask me if id like to sit just because i happened to be standing in front of them. ive seen men and women get up for pregnant women on the subway, open doors for them, etc. but i also remember one time i was going to work with my aunt, we were on the bus, she was 8 months pregnant (so it was very obvious) and no one got up for her!!
often times u meet people on line in stores or restaurants and we have friendly conversations going so it definitely depends on who u meet.
as far as girls in the city are concerned. i dont have THAT big of an attitude. im pretty nice and friendly. btw check out my signature. :D
My hubby, bless his heart, is one of those who gives up his seat...and he gives it up like a gentleman for a gal, any gal. This makes me proud of him even if he does get stares and glares over it occasionally.
When you're taking the subway esp at rush hour, people tend to be animals. I had a few horrid experiences, one when I needed surgery on one foot and my other one was badly sprained. During rush hour, I was pushed and shoved because I couldnt walk fast and ferget about being offered a seat, I was lucky that I didnt get lynched for my snaily slowness!
Then living in the city, tenants would go out painting the town and drag themselves back to the building in the wee hours....not wanting to dig out their door-access-key cards, they'd just press the buzzers of every apartment in the building till someone buzzed them in.
There were also good times, good people and lovely things about living in the city. But...you have to be tough, you have to have "attitude".
