Re: children education
My son and daughter are in a public school in a junior high, and Islamic school on Sundays. We live in the midwest in a conservative area, so it may be a bit different, but we have had no problems so far. Keep your children active in sports and other activities besides academics. Aside from the obvious health benefits, my children choose to take care of their bodies, which will insh'Allah make drugs or alcohol a non-issue.
The most important thing no matter where your children go to school is to KNOW THEIR FRIENDS AND THEIR FRIENDS PARENTS, and I mean on a personal level. When my kids were in elementary I scheduled regular playdates and volunteered for everything I could. I am still on the PTA at both the elementary and If you don't want your child socializing outside of the house, then make sure that your home is welcoming for your child's friends. Host movie night, get table tennis or a foosball set for the basement, and so on. If your children's friends feel welcomed in your home, they will all want to spend time there, which makes it a lot easier to keep an eye on them. ;)
I don't believe in isolating or sheltering our children. They know their limits, and so do others. They have never hidden the fact that they are muslims, and usually have a few friends who fast with them during Ramadan, at least for a few days. I've learned that teachers are almost always willing to work with you at times when you feel uncomfortable, like Christmas. They would also love for you to come in and share your holiday traditions. (note: middle school age kids prefer to share their own tradition:))