and the time should be quality and not necesarily quantity.
i mean if it is both then that is the best but far too many times its not quality time.
I simply dont see too many stay at home moms, especially desi ones really enrich their kids time, and this I notice here in the west let alone in Pakistan where there are not as many opportunities.
parks, museums, gyms, etc etc simply dont seem to be on the list of to dos for many stay at home moms, some do but many just dont do it or dont do it enough.
I notice this a lot too. I have several friends who "stay home" and seem to spend most of their time with the kids parked in front of the TV while they have a dars or tea with other SAHMs. I never could find many desi moms to go to the science museum or storytime at the library with us when my kids were younger.
My youngest went to preschool with a little Pakistani girl who used to say that her favorite sport was "seeing the cartoons", while all of her classmates listed soccer, tee ball, or golf. Sad......
I feel sorry for mothers who don't have the luxury of making their decisions and are forced to do one or the other either by circumstnaces or society.
It's no one's place to say whether the kids will be better or worse off. Each family has its own needs and wants, not to mention their own circumstances. Some women have no choice but to go to work anyway even though they would like to stay home, while there are some women who want a life outside the house. That doesn't make each better or worse mothers, nor does it give any of you a right to say whether their children are deserving of your sympathy.
I agree and could not put it better.
Some females feel worthless at home and need their time with career or other career minded people. If the kid is enjoying their time at nursary and the mom can use the time the kid is at nursary for her now needs, then its not really a problem.
I agree with the quality statement.
Kids also need kids their agem i see many pakistani kids spending their time in from of the TV and tell me whats worst a nursary where kids enjoy and learn new things or a dumb TV program.
Sadz, it will take her a day or two to get adjusted and she will be fine. She will actually love it.
It really depends what kind of program the child is being sent to. Now a days they have these amazing kindergarten programs that provide children with a very enrich learning environment to grow. Research shows that children who have been through some sort of Pre-K programs have better success rates in kindergarten programs. They are socially more adaptable and have developed better cognitive and motor skills. Actually in Fl, they have started a program for low income families to enroll their children for pre-Kindergarten program in regular childcare centers for free. You can tell the difference b/w the kids who have never been in a pre-kindergarten program from those who have been introduced to the pre-kindergarten programs.
Yes, I don't agree that kids should be left at childcare centers from 6am to 6pm M-F (unless there is no other way around) but should be sent to some sort of pre-kindergarten program that provides them with an enriched learning environment for growth. Even if you are a stay home mom, you should enroll your child in pre-kindergarten program.
Oh and remember that every article that is on internet is not authentic. You certainly don't want to fool yourself with bogus articles.
I do agree with all of you Sara516, X2, SaadiaB, amana and Niksik.
Spending time on children and spending time with children are two different things, so the quote was right and goes for all the parents (working and non working) and basically saying the same thing that you all mentioned above. We need to make sure that we are spending time on children and not just staying **with **them.
I've also noticed that tradition of breast feeding is disappearing in desi moms, they prefer formula milk which I consider a junk food type of thing, there is another benefit in breast feeding that it creates this special relationship berween mother and baby, breast feeding mother cannot leave their babies without her hardly for 2 hours.
Now mothers who start working after 3 or 4 months of the birth of their baby cannot have that attachment to their baby.
Also here in the west I don't think mothers even single mothers have to work to support the family with all the benefits they get from the government.
And they should keep in mind the childcare cost which is quite high here in the UK.
For mums who are after their career, well there's nothing wrong in working but they should wait until their child is at least 3 years old. I'll try to give an advice which is best for parents and their children because at the end of the day all of us have the same goal which is raising our children in a best way so they can become the best of humanity.
hareem, good points, but I would like to point out that there are really zero govt benefits in US for stay at home moms. I mean the welfare isue is a whole diff scenario but it does not apply to most ppl.