Chalo hans lo (before Monday Morning Blues)

Hangout Humor (Rated G)
1

Narad Muni dharti par madira* peene aaye,
12 botal pilane ke baad theke wala: Apko chadhti kyun nahi ?
Narad Muni: Main Bhagwaan Hoon.
Theke wala: Chad gayi saley ko.

+++++++++++++++++++++++

  • Sharab
    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Sharab ek Bimari hai jo pure samaj ko khatam kar deti hai. To aao milkar is bimari ko khatam karen. ek bottle tum khatam karo ek bottle hum khatam karen.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Ek yug tha jab log apne ghar ke dwar pe likhte the: ATITHI DEVO BHAVA
Phir likha: SHUBH LABH
Phir likhne lage: U R WELCOME
Aur ab likhte hain: KUTTON SE SAVDHAN
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Kuri waley Munde nu: Tusi nonveg khandey ho?
Munda: Haan
Sharaab?
Haan
Drugs?
Haan
Jua?
Haan
Sab kuch negative hai, kuch positive ve hai?
Munda: Haanji, HIV+

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Kudi waale pandit nu: Saanu aheja munda chahida jehra kuj khanda penda na howe.
Pandit: Aheja munda taan PGI Emergency ward wich hi mil sakda +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Teacher to class: A for?
Class: Apple
Teacher: Jor Se Bolo
Class: Jai Mata Di
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Train mein TT Sadhu se bola: Kahan jana hai?
Sadhu: Jahan Ram ka janam hua tha. (Ayodhya)
TT: Ticket hai?
Sadhu: Nahin
TT: Chalo
Sadhu: Kahan?
TT: Jahan Krishan ka janam hua tha.. Jail mein
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

2

Re: Chalo hans lo (before Monday Morning Blues)

^:D

…good jokes…mazaa aa geyaa

…sirf woh Positive negative waala semejh mein nahin aaya(the man replies all positive?)…shayad mujhe Punjabi nahin aati issilye:confused:

Fashion blunder made by females
3

Re: Chalo hans lo (before Monday Morning Blues)

Kuri waley Munde nu: Tusi nonveg khandey ho?
Ladki waale: do you eat non-veg ?
Munda: Haan
Boy :Yes
Sharaab? (Alcohol)
Haan (Yes)
Drugs?
Haan (Yes)
Jua? (Gambling, Satta) ?
Haan (Yes)
Sab kuch negative hai, kuch positive ve hai?
(So many negative qualities, do you have even one positive quality ?)
Munda: Haanji, HIV+
Boy: (Yes I do have, I am HIV +ve)

4

Re: Chalo hans lo (before Monday Morning Blues)

:omg:

5

Eye donation

Sharabi eyes donate karne gaya.
Counter Clerk asks: Kuch kehna chahte ho?
Sharabi: Jise lagao usse bata dena ye do peg ke baad khulti hain.

6

Yaad mein tumhari mujhe loose motions lag gaye hain.
Hain to ye aanso per lagta hai raasta bhatak gaye hain.

U luv sumone... u marry sumone else. The one u marry becomes ur wife or husband & the one u loved becomes the password of your emai id...!

In French: Bon jour
In Spanish: Te Quiro
In Italian: Teamo
In Yugoslav: Volim Te
In English: Good Morning
In Punjabi: Uth Mar jaaneyaa kam te nahi jana?

7

Re: Chalo hans lo (before Monday Morning Blues)

Gabbar: Kitne admi they?
Sambha: Sardar 2
Gabbar: Mujhe ginti nahin aati, 2 kitne hote hain?
Samba: Sardar 2, 1 ke baad aata hai
Gabbar: Aur 2 ke pehle?
Samba: 2 k pehle 1 aata hai.
Gabbar: To beech mein kaun ata hai?
Samba: Beech mein koi nahi aata>
Gabbar:: To phir dono ek saath kyun nahin aate?
Samba: 1 k baad hi 2 aa sakta hai, kyun ki 2, 1 se bada hai.
Gabar: 2, 1 se kitna bada hai?
Samba: 2, 1 se 1 bada hai.
Gabbar: Agar 2, 1 se 1 bada hai to 1, 1 se kitna bada hai?
Samnba: Sardar maine aapka namak khaya hai, mujhe goli maar do

8

Re: Chalo hans lo (before Monday Morning Blues)

** HallaGulla, please do not post 3 or more consecutive replies. Instead, you can just post multiple jokes in one post. **

9

Re: Chalo hans lo (before Monday Morning Blues)

I salute you maam.

10

Re: Eye donation

what's peg?

11

Re: Eye donation

'Peg' means a glass partly filled with liquor.
Do you know Punjabi or not ?

12

Re: Chalo hans lo (before Monday Morning Blues)

Not as much as you do. :(

13

Re: Chalo hans lo (before Monday Morning Blues)

lol @ #7

14

Re: Chalo hans lo (before Monday Morning Blues)

Good one!:D