What should I do ? If I am a chalaak husband who always come in between my wife’s decision of giving away as much sadaqa as possible. Whenever she wants to give anyone a benefit of doubt, a helping hand, I come in the way and put in her mind “waswasa” (doubts) that this person is not deserving, he must be trying to fool you. You are too simple and don’t know these kinds of people. Why do you give away so much in courtesy and good intentions. Money don’t come that easy, we should have ‘qadr’ of it when it comes to sending it to the account of hereafter. Money is to be spent in this world only on ourselves.
If she wants to donate for the Masjid or orphanage, I remind her that in future we would have children who would go to school and this sadaqa might decrease that saving. I happily and easily spend a lot of money on my own fashion, dressing combinations, furniture,…etc. but when it comes to giving to Allah (swt), suddenly I start feeling myself very poor and needy.
Please help me. How can I reduce this immense love for money ?
p.s. Why are husbands always so miser, judgmental and cunning, and their wives so generous, helping and keen for an opportunity to help people even if it means that they have to sacrifice their own belongings. (MashaAllah).
Re: 'Chalaak' Husbands and 'Saada' wives combination
"always"....??
That sounds like an absolute and there are exceptions. It could even be that some of them are trying to be protective....it's natural to not want be taken for a ride.
Re: 'Chalaak' Husbands and 'Saada' wives combination
p.s. Why are husbands always so miser, judgmental and cunning, and their wives so generous, helping and keen for an opportunity to help people even if it means that they have to sacrifice their own belongings. (MashaAllah).
Re: 'Chalaak' Husbands and 'Saada' wives combination
^ JazakAllah khair for the kind advice. Well said. May Allah (Swt) bless me with the wisdom to not only understand but also believe that charity increase wealth just like interest decreases it.
Re: 'Chalaak' Husbands and 'Saada' wives combination
Husbands always compare and compete in having better shoes, brief cases, better cars, better dresses, better wallets, better houses...etc. and other belongings. On the other hand, wives mashaAllah keep advising them to not compare. What has your friend's furniture to do with selection of yours ? Just be contented with what you already have. Why compare their house with ours, their curtains with ours, their decoration pieces with ours, their carpets with ours...so on.
Husbands spend all day discussing the color of their coat, the design of their pents and the tailor they selected to make such gorgeous style, the brand of their shoes, their hair styles, the gents parlor they selected to make such a beautiful hair style. The positive comment their boss gave about that particular tie, the negative comment that colleague gave about their office settings. How dare that relative of mine gave such a bad comment about my car, has he ever looked at his own car and its color, which doesn't even suit that model. The color of my car is perfectly matching with its model.
Seriously, all husbands should learn from their wives to not get into comparisons and confrontations and to give importance to the matters that are more important.