How many of you folks moved for your husband, vs. the other way around, and how easy/hard was it to find a job in another city? Were you at home for months looking for the job? Did you move because you’re the female and it was expected of your gender? Could your spouse have uprooted his life and have moved?
Career Women - Moving
I moved took me a while to settle in this city (still dont like it) jobless for a few months drove me mad! (Especially the inlaws meh) but hubby moving wasnt an option as hes settled in his job past 10 years made sense for me to move the broke graduate lol but its ok worked out i still would prefer to move back to my home city just discovered hubbys work has a sister company he could transfer to.. Now question is will he lol
Re: Career Women - Moving
I moved, from Pakistan to the US. I immediately got pregnant and had very debilitating pregnancies. Plus I was not authorized to work due to the fact that my husband was on a work visa and I came on his spouse visa. Later we got a green card and then citizenship. I was in middle management before I got married. I did work a bit after marriage but really finding work after so much time had passed was very hard and certainly no one would give me a middle management position after many years had elapsed. But it did make sense for me to move to the US versus Pakistan.
Re: Career Women - Moving
I know a couple where the husband left his family and good job in nyc to move to where wife was working because wife made more money. That guy ended up working from home in the new city until he found a job.
I also know a family where both parents worked full time. After the birth of their first child, they decided the one who earns lesser should stay home with baby. Hence the husband became stay at home dad.
Both cases involve muslim pakistani men. So yes, there is hope!
Re: Career Women - Moving
as long as you consider your partner as a human and not a servant who should do sacrifice for you (hint: woman) then there is no such question. Logically, the person who is more settled should remain where s/he is and their partner should move to their place.
I, as a guy, have absolutely no issue if I met a girl who happen to be more settled OR the its hard for her to find a job in my city compared to her city.
Re: Career Women - Moving
I moved, took me a while but I settled. Husband was settled in his career and it just made more sense. Had I been earning more, he probably would have moved because he's open to it if the opportunity is right.
Re: Career Women - Moving
My husband moved cities to be with me. I made more at the time, but he'd been looking to change his job anyway. Plus, my family has been settled here for over a decade and he doesn't have much family in North America. It took a few difficult months, but as luck would have it, he got a much better job in my city and is now outearning me by quite a bit (alhamdolillah) :)
Re: Career Women - Moving
I moved from NYC to suburbs in North Carolina where my husband was because I had always planned to move to suburbs after getting married (I was living in manhattan). I was in middle management and my husband had the same level of experience. Luckily my employer asked me to work from home instead of resigning so it's all ok by far but I was comfortable with searching a position in the new place as it's near RTP and they have a lot of opportunities available.
Re: Career Women - Moving
How many of you folks moved for your husband, vs. the other way around
We recently moved to another city for my husband's job. Previously, we both lived in the same city, so I don't know if that counts.
how easy/hard was it to find a job in another city? Were you at home for months looking for the job?
I'm still in the process of looking for a job here and have a couple interviews coming up (so, hopefully soon). It's only been about 2 and a half months since we moved though.
I think how easy or difficult it is to find a job in a new city partially depends on what your job is, where you move to, and whether or not there is a large demand for what you do in the city you move to.
Did you move because you're the female and it was expected of your gender?
No, nothing to do with that. I moved because it was for his job. He's already established in his field and I only graduated uni last May and had only been working at my job for about 6 months. Realistically, 6 months is nothing and it didn't make sense (to us) to turn down a rather good position at a job you've been at for 5-6 years on account of that.
Could your spouse have uprooted his life and have moved?
Probably. If the circumstances were reversed, I don't think he'd have issues moving as he's moved around quite a bit in his life and doesn't have the issue of "but I've spent my entire life here and everything is here."
Re: Career Women - Moving
I'm lucky Mashallah that my husband moved for me - I'm a doctor and I got residency in a specific city, quite far from where we use to live. So my husband and me mutually came to the decision to move. I had 2 choices of where to do residency but this was the specialization I wanted and had worked really hard for. My husband is now self employed so it worked out but I love him so much for always standing by me. There is hope and he was born in KHI, so not all Pakistani men are that of the typical stereotype. :)