Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
its not being equated with better parenting...its independent of better parenting...
You're a good parent depending upon WHO you are, and how much effort you put into your parenting - not necessarily how many hours in the day. Effective parenting starts with understanding your kids and being able to communicate with them - which most desi moms don't know how to do in the first place!
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
Advice you should take yourself before making any of your blanket statements which are based more in fiction than fact.
What? Now let me guess you are making this statement ** from the experience of others, and not of yourself and certainly don’t make it a blanket statement because you haven’t seen all there is to experience. :)**
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
yes, well i've NEVER made a blanket statement on the topic - I've merely said that working moms CAN be great moms, contrary to what people think...
I'm actually opposing the blanket statement of working moms CANNOT be great moms. Therefore, I am actually following my advice. Read thru my comments and you'll see again and again, that whether a mom works for me is irrelevant - its more about how developed of a person she is and how learned she is and flexible, and yada yada yada other such virtues.
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
Few working women can mange to be good MOMs as well, and few moms even at home will not do a good job of parenting. But the odds are that a full time MOM can do a better job of parenting,at least till the children are in secondary school.
Many people have started to realize this, and its not uncommon now to see women taking a break in their carrier for kids.
Go ask the kids in your school, if they wud like to have their MOM at home when they come home.......or may u happen to be in a school where most moms are just crap who have no interest in kids.
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
My friend is a single mom too, but she doesn’t neglect her children. She has some friends who are also single moms and still good moms.
My friend is a little bit stressed too, she is also very very tired in her mind. But she is not tired or stressed because of her job, she has different issues. She is tired of other peoples attitudes. That is what exhausts her. not her job, which she loves to do.
Still she is a good mom. She comes home, hangs around the internet to relax, starts cleaning and cooking at the same time and gives attention to her children. In the weekends and on her one day off in the middle of the week, she has more time for her children. The children don’t complain. And believe me, when they don’t like something, they complain a lot!
You can be a working/single mom, and still make time for your children. Work four days, or less. When you pick up your children from daycare centre or the centre where they go after school time, on your way home start listening to what they are telling you. Ask them about their day. Really LISTEN to your children and react to what they tell you. When you start cooking and cleaning at home, you can keep it simple and in the weekend and on your day off you can spend more time on cooking and cleaning. You can just clean the floor, the tables, do your dishes and the bigger kitchen mess, clean the bathroom/toilets, and of course all bedrooms, iron or wash the most important clothes and save the rest of the work when you’re home all day.
After dinner and cleaning dinner mess, you can spend some more time with your kids before they go to sleep. After they sleep you can relax by studying, internetting etc.
It all comes down to your organisation skills. Once you get used to it and found your rythm, it’s not that hard. 
A child doesn’t have to turn out negative in one way or another because of working Moms. It should just always have enough attention from its parents/Mom.
Even children with both parents or with a Mom home all day long can still turn out negative in different ways!
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
Here’s a study that looked into the childs cognitive ability and the time spent with children.
Type of care may impact kids’ success
06:16 AEST Tue Aug 23 2005
AAP
Working single mothers who rely on their family, friends, or other informal child care providers to look after their children during work hours may, in doing so, negatively influence their child’s mental development, new study findings in the US suggest.
This negative effect of a mother’s reduced contact time with her child may be offset, however, by enrolling the child in pre-school or some other type of formal centre-based care instead, according to the study’s authors.
“I would say that the crucial thing to take from the paper is that separation from the mother can be detrimental for children, but mothers can partially offset this by choosing the appropriate type of daycare,” Professor Raquel Bernal, of Northwestern University in Chicago, Illinois, said
http://news.ninemsn.com.au/article.aspx?id=58620
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
Sadya, u cannot take one example and generalize it to everyone, it has been consistently found that if u look at a cohort of single mothers they are more likely to neglect their children. Your friend might do an even better job of parenting if she wasn't single. This ofcourse depends upon the circumstances. I am not blaming her, she might be in this situation for no fault of hers. But two parent families are better than one parent families.
Ever heard of words 'Yateem', sotaily maan or baap......
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
Your thread is about daycares and preschools and such. Did you even read what this study says? Apparently you can't read, because the study you posted DIRECTLY CONTRADICTS what you've said...
This negative effect of a mother's reduced contact time with her child may be offset, however, by enrolling the child in pre-school or some other type of formal centre-based care instead
but mothers can partially offset this by choosing the appropriate type of daycare
Meaning that these facilities are much more than "child storage" facilities - as long as you look for the right daycare/preschool.
Besides, you can have a job, and definitely take a few years off from your work to raise your kids before they get into school. Its harder taht way in some fields since you have to come back in and work your way up, but you can keep up with things in the field in your time off if you're smart about it. Its all about proper planning.
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
Few working women can mange to be good MOMs as well, and few moms even at home will not do a good job of parenting. But the odds are that a full time MOM can do a better job of parenting,at least till the children are in secondary school.
I'd like to see you pull up a study on this...not a correlational one - a CAUSAL one. :)
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
If having a mother around all the time was so beneficial, why are desis back in Pakistan so friggin screwed up. I dont usually see desi kids in US go beat up other desi kids because they are a diff ethnicity or sect, seems to be quite wide spread in Pakistan.
How many mothers who are stay at home moms actually good mothers? when we talk of type of care, it is not simply being with the mother 24/7 versus day care, type..and quality of care varies among mothers too.
All of us probably know atleast one stay at home mom whoe house is a mess, kids are filthy, bratty and misbehaved. some standard of care they are getting eh?
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
There are variety of factors that affect a child’s performance in later life, hence its impossible have a study that determines a CASUAL relationship, it can only be a correlational one
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
My thread is NOT about daycares, its bout career minded mothers who neglect their children.
And YOU frgot to read the word PARTIALLY.
Read again:
mothers can partially offset this by choosing the appropriate type of daycare
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
Then if your studies can only be correlational, you cannot say the CAREER of a woman is what destroys her home. :-) Because that is a causal connection. If you wish to pursue your point as a causal one, then you need to come up with causal-studies (i.e. true experiments).
Partially is there, and I did see it - your reference to daycares and such is describing them as "childhood STORAGE facilities", and this study you posted describes the UTILITY of these daycares, if the right one is chosen.
Also, you didn't post the more pertinent points of the study which highlight that deficiencies were found where the children were left to an INFORMAL (that is the word the study uses) care, rather than formal care.
So the study actually does not support your claims in any way whatsoever.
Re: Career Minded Parents and Child Storage Facilities
No fraudia. That is why you don’t have Colombine in the US. 
Check the news in your local area, there is enough child on child crime in the US to make your blood boil. Remember the 8 year old that killed his fellow student in the US?