have u ever felt tht ur partner/other half might feel little jealousy esp. when it comes to your career and education? if yes? howd u deal with it?
Re: career and education jealousy
No, never. But have you talked it out? Does he know this is what you suspect?
Drum it into him that you are both 1 team, what is good for 1 is good for the other.
Re: career and education jealousy
That's why it's important for the guy to always be more educated and have a better career than you! :D Coz guys can get insecure if their wives earn more or are more educated than them.
I agree with Rupay, you need to talk to him and explain that any success you have for yourself will enrich the family as a whole. He may be feeling like your life is moving on and that you are leaving him behind, just reassure him that you intentions are honorable and you only act in the best interests of your family.
I don't agree that the husband should be more educated then the wife, infact I think it's more important for the wife to be educated as it is her responsibility to educate their children.
I don't believe insecurity over a womens success is an intrinsic part of the male persona, after all the Prophet (PBUH) was illiterate and his first wife was a highly educated and sucessful business women. If the messenger of Allah could tolerate a more educated wife that any man can.
That's why it's important for the guy to always be more educated and have a better career than you! :D Coz guys can get insecure if their wives earn more or are more educated than them.
Ur comment holds true for alot of couples- i know of a couple who wee facing this same issue- the husband was the one with a problem- not that the wife was equally educated but that she was working and earning as well as the hubby ( the hubby actually wanted a working woman!).....so really it comes down to in this instance the husband wanting to control the wife - at first it was cool that both were working but then as the wife has her own money - that gives her her own financial independance and this was the crux of the argument- so when a man says hes cool with a working partner- always double check!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Re: career and education jealousy
My husband is this over-achiever, super-successful, always on- top- of- his- class type of smart guy, and I have always been soooo proud of him. However, when I got married, a couple of people from my hubby's side tried to evoke that jealousy/envy in me by making it seem as if he was wayyy too smart for me.. I was like yeah well, too bad the genius is all mine now =) Seriously, anything he accomplishes makes me feel over the moon and just so proud of him. After all, we share lives now.. his success is mine too, how can I ever get jealous?
My ex was jealous when I was finishing school. He kept saying, that since he wasn't educated that much, I had no need either. But my education was a normal education, just for a job. I didn't do anything special. But just even that was difficult for him I think, because he kept telling me, that he was doing fine without more education, so I should stop mine. Eventually I did stop with my educatin and I regret it.
Re: career and education jealousy
men can sometimes get intimadated by women who earn more or are more educated. its ur job to reassure if they ever feel that way.
in my case me and my fiance are equal in that we both are educated to the same level however he has said to me if i wana do phd(LOL) i can, hes not interested in studying so hes ok with me doing it.
same goes for my cousins, they want their wives to work and be educated.
its normal for him to feel insecure though, so reassure and dont undermine him.
My ex was jealous when I was finishing school. He kept saying, that since he wasn't educated that much, I had no need either. But my education was a normal education, just for a job. I didn't do anything special. But just even that was difficult for him I think, because he kept telling me, that he was doing fine without more education, so I should stop mine. Eventually I did stop with my educatin and I regret it.
it's never too late to go back.
If this is something that you really want to pursue and he is the reason you stopped pursuing it......you will end up resenting him for the rest of your life.
i think mostly guys tend to get insecure by higher income earnign better educated wife, however i know instants where if they dont show any jealousy then women begin to read too much into it and consider them mooching off on their money. so its a crazy little world.