Just wondering, as a parent would you rather your child be the bully or the victim of bullying? Why, why not? This is worst case scenario where you were in this situation.
I don’t think there is a right or wrong answer, everyone’s experience shapes their opinions.
Re: Bullying
Obviously neither 
To me, being the bully would mean…I’ve done something very very very wrong with raising my child.
Re: Bullying
^ oops, let me add that in LOL
Re: Bullying
Well I think it depends on the child’s personality. My son is a very very gentle, sweet kid. Its awesome for his parents, but when I see him interacting with others kids his age (he’s 2), it makes my blood boil to see the other kids ALWAYS just take his toys away and he hardly even protests vocally. Its one thing to share, but its another to literally take the toy and run away! wtf! and then the parents don’t even stop their kids. On the other hand, if he wants a toy some other kid has, he will never even dare approach the other child.
So given the above scenarios, I kind of, secretly wish my kid could just learn a little bit more, umm, aggression from the bullies before he has to start going to school.
Re: Bullying
My kid is somewhat of a bully, he just has a strong presence that the other kids just back off in general I used to be bullied and picked upon for a long time so secretly I am glad that he is street smart and stands up for himself. But I’m trying to raise him to be gentle he’s just 2.5, hes calmed down a lot since he started talking.
Re: Bullying
I m mommy of a victim to bullying. I posted here a while ago to get some advice as well. Niece is getting better but still hits baby every chance she gets. I ve started to be a bit more strict and I think that’s helping too. I also raised my concerns and her parents are getting a bit more careful as well.
No one wants their kid to be bullied. It’s painful and can get dangerous if little kids are involved.
In my case it’s almost 4 year old vs 6 month old.
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I was worried about my older niece getting bullied but not anymore. She’s been through it a few times now and is learning to stand up for herself Alhumdulillah.
I don’t want her to be mean to anyone but I certainly don’t want anyone pushing her around either.
The younger one though, she’s a bit more quiet and doesn’t fight back…yet. She’s only 3…I think she’ll learn though Inshallah.
Re: Bullying
“Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behavior is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time. Bullying includes actions such as making threats, spreading rumors, attacking someone physically or verbally, and excluding someone from a group on purpose.”
My oldest daughter was physically bullied by a Muslim male teacher in an Islamic school when she was just a 1st grader. . I saw it happen with my own eyes. I was told by the board of the masjid/ BOD to ‘not make waves’.. “we should forgive one another”. I did not keep quiet, and kept at it until the teacher was let go.
Again same daughter was bullied by a male teacher after 9/11 in middle school . At the same time, she was constantly bullied by a fellow student. I documented every incident, and then approached the principal of the school. We had the option to press charges, and were encouraged to do so by the ISD. We did not. The teacher was quietly let go, the other student was suspended for a few days, but it remains on his record. His parents begged us to not press charges.
My oldest daughter is very calm, very fair..and not a bully at all. She can stand up for herself, and she does not feel it has effected her negatively.
My other teenager daughter is indirectly bullied by a fellow Muslim student. She is excluded all the time, made to feel worthless by catty rumours. We have spoken to counsellors, teachers, and all say ‘there is no physical evidence’, so they cannot take action! All agree that something is going on. I have spoken to the parents, and well, that did not go well at all. The next school year my daughter will be attending another school.
My above daughter was a very happy go lucky kid, always smiling. Nowadays she does not smile as much, but again is learning to do so. She is well liked by her peers, and all Aunties/Uncles no matter where we go. She is a smart ass student MA. The counsellors tell me , it is jealousy that is fueling the ‘bully’.
I would not want any of my children to be those who bully others, despite their experiences.
Re: Bullying
neither! I want my child to stand up against the bully.