I think my older son is now reacting to my 2nd child.
Older one is 3 and the younger one is 18months.
Problems
the older one pushes away the little guy; I took the baby to visit Bhai’s school and Bhai wasn’t a happy camper
behavioral issues with the older one; plain old doesnt listen and is lashing out in every way he can.
I dont miss an oppurtunity to hug him loads and make a point to spend time with him.
Every once to twice a month we go have a date night and get pizza and a movie out by ourselves.
What else can I do to make him feel loved and comfortable?
Consider that I do have to spend a great deal of time with the little one because he’s not as independant as the older guy.
Breaks my heart - I know they’ll be okay. But I dont want either to suffer even for a little bit let alone the couple of years it’ll take them to grow up and understand that Mommy and daddy love both of them equally.
How is he with kidsin school? Is he the same or more calm and relaxed and friendly?
I have a soon to be 3 yr old and the "boy" in him just came out.... Maybe its what they are meant to be doing at this age? Sudden independance of self eating, putting clothes on etc...feel so big... Thnk they "own" other kids?
...but I would suggest that keep drilling the fact that "he's the big brother" and big brother do this.
I always do that with my girls. I show her examples of what big sisters do - what I do for my little sister and she gets that that big sisters get to do everything FIRST however they also take care of the little ones too.
also have a 10 minutes bonding night time routine. I tuck them in. Read ayat kursi. I do some silly things like purr like cats. Lots and hugs and kisses so we end the day with a smile.
I think its a phase....my nephew was very much like this when he was at that age.
So much so that Noor hated being around him. She found him to be 'annoying' which is really odd because otherwise she was always very loving and protective of him. I was worried that the two of them were growing apart.
But tolerance, teaching her that he is going through a growing phase and just waiting it out made it all okay.
They are best buddies again and she would, once again, kill to protect him.
Maybees make him a 'SUPER STAR BIG BROTHER' badge. Big up the whole big brother thing so he sees it as something exciting. Act like there is no other super star big brother in the whole of the world so his job is SO important.
Its a phase i guess. My 25 months nd 12 months are the same. Sara doesn't leave any single chance to push her bro. When we ask her to say sorry nd kiss him she does it. If she notices some one is watching her she avoids pushing or biting him. At times she wants him to ride her car nd sit on slide nd at times he will be pushed even if he dares to touch it....
All the time we are telling her that she is a baji now nd she must take care of bhai. I think it makes difference.
I have 3 yr old boys in my class and they know how to play you. They are extremely high energy, mostly they think it is their way or the highway. Melt down can be pretty awful too. Oh and they can be extremely loving or pretty mean at times. I would say keep reminding him that he is a big brother, make him excited about things he can do for his little bro.
