My inlaws were visiting us last week and the women all love touching my belly. It’s awkward but I’m getting used to it so I’m ok. But last week, my FIL walked up to me and rubbed my belly and made a kiss sound. I was so taken aback. I know my inlaws are not reserved like my side of the family, men and women openly talk about periods and pregnancy details like epiostomies and social problems like rape. Whereas, in my family the men and women don’t openly talk to each other about such topics and they are quite reserved. Anyway, I had started getting used to people discussing my body and health in front of the men of the family, but I sure as hell wasn’t expecting to get my belly rubbed by my FIL. I really wanted to just rub his potbelly back but I decided that it would cause unnecessary drama. So just gave an awkward smile and took a few steps back.
They’ll be back around the time of the due date so hopefully I’ve already given birth by then.
What would you have done?
Re: Belly rubs
you should have puked at him. He wouldn't have come near you again
Re: Belly rubs
Personally, I don't like it even if women touch your belly out of the blue. It really does make you uncomfortable plus I find it disrespecting. I don't want anyone to touch me, so I guess I would be pretty creeped out if any male did so. But I think you should let it go this time, it might just be a one time thing. Next time stop him in time and explain you are not comfortable with such behavior. And why is everyone discussing your body? Sounds very weird tbh.
Re: Belly rubs
Aaze, I did let it go. They live far away and visit occasionally so I don't need to make a big deal about something that wont happen again in the near future.
I just wanted to see how other women would've reacted
Re: Belly rubs
The belly rubbing and poking irritated me SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much!
I hated it...and I've personally never ever rubbed anyone's belly or poked them.
Its kinda weird for FIL to do that. :(
Re: Belly rubs
Wow, very wierd! Rape and pregnancy without going into detail are ok with me but def not periods and episiotomies. They should respect everyone's privacy and personal space. What are your husband's thoughts on this?
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Oh that's a little odd even if it were to be in more liberal families like mine. Conversation is one thing but older males especially touching my belly would make me uncomfortable for sure. Is he more of the hugging type of FIL, maybe he didn't realize the boundary there when some families are big on hugging and kissing so it depends I guess in their nature that way.
On a side note, I hate belly rubbing. Before I left my job my co workers were always wanting to rub my belly. I didn't mind like once in a blue moon because ppl were generally happy for me so they were just being nice but one of the ladies felt the need to do it every day when she saw me and making it a point to be like "where's that belly of mine today?" It really bothered me but I never said to her to avoid making it awkward but ppl can be so odd. They don't realize how annoying it can be.
Re: Belly rubs
That's not right. You should have told him he shouldn't have done that. A private word with him.
I always kept my distance from people and kept my hands in front of me because I didn't feel comfortable with that.
Also your FIL doesn't seem to know that there are certain boundaries between him and his DIL. Not acceptable.