Being stupid ?

There was a girl whose only source of joy was her wonderland, her own fantasies and so led a reclusive life..She dreamt of marrying an unknown guy though talks of her possible marriage with one of her cousins, her childhood best friend had already gained widespread attention..The girl had great faith in Destiny and knew she will never be committed to the guy she had always mocked at. Not that the guy wasn’t good, actually he was a very sincere, shy type of a guy-an exact opposite of her self- but she hated family ‘khichdi’, and wanted someone more outgoing, humorous and charming!

The wheels of time turned by and she was transformed in a super confident, well spoken and good looking girl, an all rounder at college and desirable in all forms. People came to ask for her hand from far and near but her parents denied all the proposals only to add to her frustration coz everytime a ray of hope flickered at the end of the tunnel, her parents blocked it with excuses that appeared really stupid to her. (then)

Meanwhile, destiny introduced her to a guy as senior by 8 years, who won her attention because he never left a chance to get a glimpse of her even while standing amidst a crowd of say 50..There was something about the guy she liked but her friends didn’t. Nonetheless, the guy sent a proposal to her place and as history, it got rejected too! Not only that, the sister rung up her mother accusing the girl of having a torrid affair with her brother..It hurted her mother even though it wasn’t completely true..That lady’s harsh words made her mother very sombre and the gal could never breathe an air free of guilt!

Time is the best healer, they say, perhaps very true! All the bad memories faded away when a new person sought refuge in her heart. He was just as she had always dreamed of- funny to the core, a bit hot tempered but a nice person. He belonged to a completely different sect of Islam and their marriage could be termed as anything more severe than the word impossible! However, she went ahead treating him like her best best pal; for her love wasn’t all about candle light dinners, roses and kisses; in fact, kisses, hugs or physical proximity of any kind was a strict no-no for her! She loved him with all her heart, knowing they will have to part ways sooner or later but she craved just for his presence in her life! Maybe she was getting too demanding or was under estimating life and it’s cruel game ethics! He soon dumped her because she was too shy, sharmeeli for him to handle..(Some of her friends always knew what he wanted of her but were afraid to divulge coz they thought she was totally blind !)

Wounded and bruised, the girl once again began sailing off to an unknown shore.. She smiled and breathed only for her parents’ sake. Had absolutely no enthusiasm and cried whenever the parents were away..She mentally lived as if her emotions were a dead body that was put in a coffin of unending remorse, guilt and repentance..She was still pure of carnal sins, hadn’t ever dined or went outing with any of the guys but was guilty of the messages exchanged. She believed she was nomore the pure and good character girl that the entire world knew her as! But there isn’t anything like visiting the past and undoing all the mistakes as such..

And now, the girl is getting married to the guy she had always put in disdain. He’s the same person who didn’t appeal to her more than a friend. He’s a slim, 5’9 tall soft spoken, serious looking guy, perfect namazi and with a blank record of mischief! She’s still trying to convince her heart to reciprocate all the love she’s getting from him, irrespective of the personality factors she had wished for..Don’t know how to put it, but the girl appreciates all his noble qualities but the idiot in her is yet to discard off all the memories of her ex and feels pathetic of herself when she returns his I love you’s half heartedly!!

I find this story very complicated to answer so I request my fellow Guppies to please do the needful..!

Re: Being stupid ?

Seems like the parents were holding out for this guy all the time and now they got what they wanted. If u aren't strong enough to fight it, then accept it and move on from weirdo ex'es who seemed to be after something different than u wanted.

If u don't want to accept it n be happy then stand your ground now and say NO, or forever hold your peace.

Seems like there's nothing bad about the guy but only u and time will tell if u get along well enough as a married couple.

U could go back to basics and the belief that everything happens for a reason, perhaps all the others have not worked out bcos they weren't good enough for the future?

Re: Being stupid ?

BTW I don't believe in "I love you"s uttered before the person gets a chance or experience to know what love really means.

And such is life.

Re: Being stupid ?

Can someone summarize? A cliff's notes?

Re: Being stupid ?

basically her parents wanted her to marry this one guy she had no interest in, they rejected all the rishte that came for her.. ones she wanted to go ahead with... and is now marrying the guy her parents wanted from the start.

And yeah, she doesnt quite know how to feel at this moment

Re: Being stupid ?

Why is she marrying this guy she disdains?

Re: Being stupid ?

The classic question repeatedly asked in Pakistani history.

Re: Being stupid ?

a lot of girls dont have the "independance" that most of us have.. i guess. Hence succumb to pressures...

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Dat be why a woman gotta watch her back yo.

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^ thats what girls mostly think.... that their parents have got their back.. why do they need to worry huh?

Re: Being stupid ?

you should fight to get what you love else you will be forced to love whatever you get.
:@:

but this guy she is marrying seems to be much better than the other ones.but as soemone said time will tell.

Re: Being stupid ?

The guy can be a prince.......does that guarantee love?

The people who like us, the ones we dont like back...are they bad people? No.

They are simply not the right people for us.

All Im going to say is:

You can blame all of your naivete on youth and innocense, but how will you answer yourself 10 years from now when you're waking up to the wrong person every single day? Who is to blame then? Can this girl really claim to be a victim of circumstance and trying to please her parents then? Will her parents be okay knowing she suffers? Their hardwork gone down the drain after a child that isnt even happy now?

Even if you dont love yourself anymore...you now have another person in your life who will be affected by your decisions. You should think about his future and happiness, if not your own.

Re: Being stupid ?

So the guy basically dumped her for being too shy and she has emotions for her.
Sounds like she loves to live a life of fantasy and dream. Is she very young and naive?

Now she has another person. **If he has no real bad qualities, **then I think she should go for it.

It is ideal if one gets married to the person who one really has emotions for but there is more to just love or what we call love before marriage than love after marriage. Many a times it is infatuation than love.

**Realities of life are like cold shower on love before marriage.

**

Re: Being stupid ?

Thats what happens when you let girls talk to boys. They dream up stories. Now that poor bloke has to suffer the rest of this life. May God give you strength my brother.

You rock!!!

Surprised to know it's a classic question there as well but the main intention behind such a "story" was just that I kinda feel agitated hearing the 'i-didn't-know-him-but-I-had-to-say-yes' kinda stories and wanted a general opinion because most of the Guppies, especially you, have always come across as really insightful and well spoken people..

Thank you for now I stand better chances of becoming the coolest agony aunt among my peers..lol!

Re: Being stupid ?

GK...you aren't currently in love with anybody ... and frm your other thread in wedding sections, you stated that u dont talk to ur fiance that much (when u started talking to him...u 2 were fighting over ur wedding outfits)...so have u actually given him a chance??? thats almost like saying no to someone on looks only. Dont u think its a little unfair.

Yes.

Re: Being stupid ?

Ever heard of something called "Fiction" ?

I wrote something about an unwed mother in the Parenting section, that does not imply it was me!

Re: Being stupid ?

oh i c...so u r just wasting our time