Re: Being misjudged?
Hey hoolahoop, when you are going through a rough patch, you are number 1. Do not feel any guilt in putting yourself first. All humans do it and you cant be superwoman. How can you sort someone else out when you arent sorted out yourself. You were not being selfish.
Remember what doesnt kill you makes you stronger, this whole experience will make you stronger.
With my ex, who used to start his sentance like...'there is something we need to talk about' and the tears would start flowing just because of fear he would let go of me.
But now i am stronger, i am stronger because i was able to let go and work on me, and learn my mistakes on my own.
I know what your talking about when it comes to guilt, if i was like this..then it would be different. if i didnt do that he would still want me...etc.
But that guilt goes with time because you have to realise that it wasnt all your fault, im sure of that from the way you are describing things, its not like you cheated on him.
I know how your feeling honestly because not too long ago (2 months back) i was in your shoes ( i have a huge thread on here if you want to read it).
You will not die without him, you do not need him to make you feel good, you do not need him to approve of you because you are worth it, yes we all have improvements to make to ourself but the person you are with brings out the best in you not puts you down constantly and if it hurts you, you have reason to fight back.
If he pointed out things and you think oh thats true....then change them, but for you not for him, for you because it will mean nothing and wont last.
Lots of people told me this, and i used to think, no the only thing that motivates me is him....but i am so thankful to those who pushed me (on this forum) and my friends and family who encouraged to me love myself and change and improve myself for me.
PM me if you want to! i know what you are going through.