Re: Being Bullied
You are right Mamaof3, preaching violence is never a good idea. But let me explain....
When I think back on that incident I see it as a time when my mother likely did what she did out of frustration, desperation and anger at the bullies rather than at me. She was new in the country with little knowledge of the systems and methods in place to deal with such issues. Her and my father were preoccupied with financial survival and providing basic needs. Neither had the time to delve into such petty matters as kid's battles in school. The fact that I was not complaining to them because I was well aware of the bigger problems they were dealing with probably made the matter even less significant and worthy of their time.
Since that time I never faced an incident of bullying that required me to react with violence. Despite the lesson that my mother taught me, it is unlikely that I would have struck anyone even if I was struck.
What her lesson DID teach me is not to accept such behaviour from anyone. It taught me to understand that nobody has a right to lay a hand on me and, if I am without any other option, I will not be punished for defending myself and paying back to such bullies in kind.
Will I teach my daughter this? Absolutely. She will find it useful not only in school but in later years if, God forbid, she should face an abusive partner.
Will I continue to monitor her and be a hands-on parent at her school where there is a chance that she may face someone that bullies? Absolutely.
Will I reinforce the concept of working out disagreements in conversation? You betcha!
Btw.....what happens when bullies are sent to juvenile for a stretch and then they return?