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Sarah: I know a few pakistani fatheads but not any flatheads. Now my curiosity is certainly peaked.
Ms Splendor,
Just out of curiosity, do you have long hair yourself? How long we are talking about here?
Not flathead. But the proper shape of the head. All parents, regardless of geography, do that. A normal head is regular, rounded shape. A baby's head is not rigid and if she is placed in wrong positions for prolonged periods, the head can become disfigured and the shape will be unsightly. There are special pillows (sometimes a bit harder than normal) which are available to make sure baby's heads develop in a regular round shape.
To the best of my knowledge, babies are not placed on rigid, hard tops. The mother might be ignorant or someone had given her some wrong information.
In Pakistan, for the most part, based on my limited knowledge, the characteristics of beauty are the same as elsewhere. Most people do value a fair complexion, bigger eyes and thin lips. Normal height is also considered better than either a very small height or too tall.
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Normal height is also considered better than either a very small height or too tall.**
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No, in case of height pakis always target people of good hight like 6' and above, ignorants forgetting that tall people are always liked in the West and civilized countries... i dont mean to say that pakis are incivilised but most of these peple say comments like: Oh labeay teru agal kidar hai, takhnay mein?, lambay ubnormal, probably the reason is inferiority complex.
My observation of the shaping of the head is limited to Sindh only.
Whenever someone had a baby in our family in pakistan, it was a tradition that this one Sindhi maai’s used to come from the neighboring gaaon to take care of the mother and the baby daily until chilla (40 days) was over. Her duty would be to ‘maalish’ the baby and the mother, and basically look after them.
Shaping of the head is very important, as a wider forhead and a flat back of the head are considered an element of beauty. The maai used to bring with her a ‘chullah’ made of mitti that was big enough to fit the baby’s head inside it. Extending upward from the ‘chullah’ would be two stick , over which a light muslin cloth would be thrown to cover the baby from flies and insects, while providing suffient space for breathing and moving. Inside the ‘chullah’ would be a small wood piece over which a pad of ‘rooi/kappah’ (raw cotton) soaked with mustard oil would be placed. That’s where the head of the baby went. A small pillow filled with sand would also be created to support the neck. So essentially the chulla is there to mold the head into the desirable shape.
When the baby was placed in the ‘chullah’ he/she usually threw a fit since, i don’t think the hard wood is a very comfortable place to rest the delicate and soft skull of a baby. Plus, the baby really can’t move its head any other way, so it has no choice but to lay on his/her back and keep the head in one position. This was only done when the baby went to sleep. Over time though, the head does flatten from the back and the forhead does become wider due to continuous massaging and pressing down on the forhead.
We often make fun of one of my younger cousins because his head is as flat as plate, on the other hand there’s another cousin who’s head wasn’t made all that well and we say that he has a ‘totarr’, meaning his head sticks out. He gets pretty worked up about it
What about tie the baby with the rope??
When i was in Pakistan we had Pathan neighbours, they had new baby girl. I went to see the new born with my mom, and i just couldn’t beleive what they did with her. She was tied up so tight with a cloth like rope or some dupatta and she could not move her hands or feet at all, even i could see she was not able to breath. I was young at that time but i guess i will never forget that horrifying thing they did. i asked why they tied the baby, her mom told me it was their culture thing and it was good for new borns
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No, in case of height pakis always target people of good hight like 6' and above, ignorants forgetting that tall people are always liked in the West and civilized countries.
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'target'??? I don't think so.. tall guys are preferred.. almost globally.. by girls at least.. but it's possible that since most desi guys don't work out and are genetically not that superior in physique they may look unattractive for a height of 6' and over.
There is No Spoon
I think the topic is beauty aspects of girls .. not boys. :)
Tall height for girls in Pakistan, more than 5'9", is generally problematic, as guys heights are usually 5'6" to 5'11", and they want their wives to be a few inches shorter. If a girl is past 6' then she will have extreme problems. Same for very short girls. Less than 5', and they will have to look for a shorter than average guy.
As far as fastening a baby in ropes... well thats a first I have heard. Although it is common practice in most cultures to keep the baby all tightly wrapped up. This is for two reasons. (1) it keeps the baby warm, and (2) for 9 months the baby is used to the very tight confines of her mother's womb. So naturally if it is kept tightly wrapped the baby is more comfortable and sleeps easily. With hands allowed to fly about, the babies can panic and keep crying. Atleast that is what the common wisdom says.
Shape of head... based on Sehar's response, it must be cultural thingy or family traditions. In almost all my friends and family a baby's head is groomed to be round and natural from behind. Effort is made to avoid head from getting too flat from behind, and it is considered a mistake.
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Sarah what about in Africa where women with large hips are considered more beautiful than small or average hips size. I heard its very importantt for girls to have large hips there in order to get good marriage proposals. Anyone wanna shed some light on it.
I think the long necks you mentioned are considered beautiful in Africa, though i cannot locate a specific region. I think women wear a stack of huge ring/necklace type thing to elongate the neck. I remember coming across a picture like that once.
The chinese tradition of binding feet reminds me of The Good Earth, it was by Pearl i believe? Don't remember.
If you talk about the beauty in urban areas, it is much influenced by the western culture as there is more exposure to it.
sheesh…little knowledge IS dangerous!. I think ALL infants are tied up, in one way or another, in Pakistan. It, sort of, minics a mother’s hold. The baby (girls and boys alike) is supposed to be comfy that way.
As for shaping heads, Again that happens to both girls and boys. Its supposed to make head round…not flat. Now you get little pillows back home which look like.. tyre tubes.
I have a fairly ‘dent zada’ head :-/ I guess I didnt get the right treatment. mommy why didnt you love me? … chalo khair
my chachi reckons that pressing the baby's nose when they are young affects the shape. Personally I think she's off her rocker - you should hear some of the other stuff she comes out with.
Ms Splendor,
Beauty is in the eye of The Beholder (and sometimes The Beerholder, as they say these days). I can volunteer to act both if you find yourself curious about your arched eyebrows (and their longevity), just to help you out in figuring out how much universal the opinion is on this matter.
Please send in a recent, hourglass-ed photograph of yourself and I'll give you my opinion in the form of an honest critique (eyebrows are a work of art, mind you).
DITTO! when my cousin was born, she was tied up like that really tightly… I was in Pakistan for the xmas holidays about 8 yrs old at that time…I kept telling them to untie the poor thing but my daadee amma kept tellng me it makes the baby feel safe/secure ‘n’ this n that…
http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/rolleyes.gif
Pakistan Zindabad!
yes this is true as women think that their future d-i-l should have wider hips, because they want a healthy grandchild and it will be easier to give birth etc
and about shaping the nose that belief is also common
the original question about shaping the head it is don so that there are no abnormal angles to the head and it is evenly rounded not that i have heard of the ‘wooden contraption’
http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/rolleyes.gif
i have heard and experienced a small pillowcase is filled with rice or dry channa and the baby lies on it an hour a day? it really works and not a myth.
as in the case of forceps delivery etc the babies head comes out pinched and mishapen which would be a shame if there was no remedy
but truly it does work.
Indian subcontinent including Pakistan is obsessed with Fair ness & FACE .
In Pakistan FACE gets 60% of the attention ,Figure probably the least less than10%
Too short or too short can ruin everything .
Long hair is as much as 30% attention b/c it is very talked about & easy to measure & quantify ,Curls slight blondish/redish hue can be good if everything else is o.k.