Re: Basic expecations in a relationship. HELP HELP HELP!
I’m beginning to wonder if you aren’t the girl in question…because if you’re really her friend I don’t think it’s wise to encourage her wishes to become a doormat for her boyfriend…even if it’s by seeking biased suggestions on an online forum.
A “normal” and “decent” girl does not put up with frequent disrespect…which is what her boyfriend is doing. A “normal” and “decent” girl understand that a healthy relationship is based upon compromise and not control/ultimatums/threats. A “normal” and “decent” girl won’t act like his “pair ki jooti .” There is nothing normal or decent about this guy or even about your friend’s attitude. And if her parents, who are the people who love her the most even if she doesn’t respect herself…were to find out about the way he’s treating her, even they would think there’s nothing normal or decent about this whole affair.
He’s just treating her like a yo-yo…breaking up with her one day and then taking her back the next day and placing a tremendous amount of stress upon her to do his bidding. And she’s too desperate to realize it because she doesn’t respect herself. Imagine being married to him and receiving threats for a divorce one day and then all is fine the next.
Men (desi or otherwise) are consistent and more clear about their expectations. Little boys like him, on the other hand, play games like this. LOL, I wouldn’t even bother with trying to find out what his “expectations” are when he’s not bothered to discuss them. I think she needs to woman-up and let him know what HER expectations are…mainly that she refuses to have anything to with a person who can’t respect her and then cut off contact with him. Then watch the tables turn as the little boy runs after his toy that’s disappeared. And the saga of ego and games will just continue. It’s really her own attitude that is the root of the problem of here…more so than her boyfriend.