What is the actual definition of backbiting?
Is it being overly sweet and friendly and nice to someone and then trashing them behind their back?
Is it talking abt someone behind ther back at all, even if it’s good things?
Is it complaining abt someone who hurt you to someone else?
Is it saying stuff behind their back AND saying hte same things to their face, i.e., not hiding anything?
Re: Backbiting...
I believe it's anything that you wouldn't say to an individual up front or something that would make the individual upset/sad/hurt upon discovering that you had things to say about him/her to others.
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I think it's saying (bad) things about someone behind his/her back that you wouldn't say in his/her presence.
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Probably all of the above.
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Is it talking bad abt someone behind ther back. Period!
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can’t be all of the above! 
if say something good about my parents to my brothers when my parents are not in the same room then that doesn’t count as backbiting. Atleast to me it doesn’t.
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Oh yeah, number 3 needs to be thrown out.
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So complaining/venting isnt backbiting? Good to know :k:
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I think back biting is saying something deliberately behind a persons back which you know you cannot say in front of the person because it would cause them pain, humiliation etc.
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I also think its talking about someone behind their back with malicious intent.
But I've seen many Desis who consider backbiting to be talking about any person not present. I think this is a Desi thing and more attributed to the guys. When ladies get together, its only natural to talk about whats going on with who and alot of Desi men I've met consider this to be backbiting. Guys tend to talk more about sports, interests, politics etc. and dont care to discuss the current events of other friends and relatives.
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^ isn't it a form of backbiting anyway?
Someone's not present and it's not exactly the best things you're discussing or the good things someone is lately up to. It's usually the negative things. Things that you wouldn't say on the person's face.
Re: Backbiting...
bacbiting::
to attack the character or reputation of (a person who is not present).
to speak unfavorably or slanderously of a person who is not present. :) :) :)
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Complaining and venting is backbiting.
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^ Really? So if someone screws you over and pisses you off, it'd be wrong to talk abt it? hmmmm..
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Behind their back yes, I would rather tell'em face to face.
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in general i personally consider backbitting to be anything that you wouldn't say to the persons face.
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ok well heres a situation for you. I married my hubby with the focus of having numerous children as soon as possible. 2 years later, I'm in the office of an infertility specialist.
Everyone in the family of course is concerned for us and eager to know whats going on. I tell the one or ones that I am comfortable with and am happy to know that they will pass on the news which is too painful for me to discuss with every every one all the time.
Its a sad thing and its a tough thing to deal with. So there ARE times when the "grapevine" serves its purpose well. Those who are good of heart will say a special prayer and who cares what the others think or say.
Re: Backbiting...
Bad mouthing ppl in front of other ppl especially when that one person is not present...Talking behind one's back in order to ruin one's reputation... But talking in good sense behind one's back is not back biting...
TC......