"Bachiyaan"

[ehl-e-chamman]

Re: “Bachiyaan”

@PyariCgudia

I have now had the privelege of hearing this term used in many circumstances. Guys will use it to refer to girls they wanna ****. I have yet to hear any respectable man refer to his wife in this way, or a respectable man refer to his fiance or girlfriend or friend in this manner either, unless he is doing it privately and I have no clue.

Usually it’s used in the sense of "oh your girlfriend’ when guys in the group really dont consider the relationship a serious one. More like “girlfriend” “whore friend” “bed buddy”

I made up bed buddy, not sure if that’s a real term, but whatever, you get my point.

I also now heard it used by shireen anwar, the respectable COOK on pakistani television - she used in reference to young girls (I’m assuming any girl younger than herself). She was doing a dua - a long-winded one at that - prior to sharing her biryani recipe with the audience and she went off praying to God that he grant all the “bachiyaan” looking for husbands, a proper husbands, that the “bachiyaan” who are looking for jobs, to help them get jobs, and (this was the killer), the “bachiyaan” who are ALREADY MARRIED AND HAVE HOMES AND KIDS to keep their household peace intact.

**Someone PLEASE EXPLAIN to me why we as a group of ethnic people, refer to ADULT WOMEN as “bachiyaan”. **

When exactly do you become an “Aurat”?

When you’re 60, and finally society decides, ok, well, she’s now had grandkids, can’t call her a bachi anymore.

I bring this up, because I wonder whether this terminology reflects our views on women as subservient, to not be taken seriously, frivolous, childish OR have we generated this terminology to DELIBERATELY change our views on women to have them viewed as children?

I don’t see how you can be calling a woman who is an adult - looking for a job, looking for a mate, already married and running a household, what have you, as a “BACHI”, and then I also don’t get why guys use this terminology, because I HOPE they’re not harboring pedophilic tendencies by wishing their girlfriends were 8 yrs old.

oh come on PCG … you know this isn’t restricted to desi culture or any particular ethnic group! Not everything needs to be divided along ethnic lines …
these particular ways of addressing women are pretty ubiquitous across the world.
don’t tell me you haven’t heard it in usa … women of all ages are referred to by men as … honey, hun, honey-chile, sweet-pea, sugar, chick, chicki, chiquita, mamma, hot mamma, babe, baby … and the list goes on … what I’ve listed are just a few of the polite names.

reasoning is simple … older person calling a younger person … child, bachi, bitiya etc … is meant as an honorific.
men using it for their female contemporaries … ranges from affection to lust to derision.
you dont like it? … fight it!.. anytime I’m called honey/sugar crap by some random male … I tell them not to call me that right then and there. Stops them cold and they never repeat the mistake.