ok when i was young, it was my greatest acheivement to be a certified babysitter. I was 12 years old and I sat for local kids from the time I was 12 till I was about 19. These days you dont see that and I actually wonder about the legality of it. I mean if you have a 12 year old watching younger kids and something drastic goes wrong, you lose your kids and can even end up in jail.
So what do you folks do? Its lovely if you have family nearby but we dont. So we do not use babysitters, not that I really need one but it would be nice - once in a while - to go out with my hubz. But its just too scary the things that can go wrong.
I don't have any kids of my own, but my bhai and bhabi have a sort of system with their friends. Every other friday they watch eachothers kids so the other couple can go out sans kids. They make any adjustments they need to in case something comes up. I think it works well for them cause they both live away from their families, plus the kids enjoy it as well cause they get to play with their friends
mama u can arrange tat sort of stuff with ur close friends too na? i thinks its a very good idea. I once made that sort of arrangement with my sis-in-law when my son was a toddler. we babysit each other's kids when one of us were going out with our husbands.
We do the same thing. If the need arises , one of the friend does the baby sitting for the kids , and we return the favor by doing the same for them when they need it.
I can never trust other kids or baby sitter to baby sit my kids. I have not met any desi who does not share this feeling.
im soo glad that in-laws live with us....i can leave my daughter with her grandmother when i go to work or school...But strangley enough hubby and i can never leave her at home and go for a couple's night out...we feel kinda guilty about that...I guess cause we are out all day anyways and evenings are the only time we have to spend some quality time with her...
yeah i dn't think thsi concept of "babystiters" exists in pakistan. At least hte people i've known, they will NEVER leave their children, even with the relatives they live with, while they go out and relax by themselves.
im soo glad that in-laws live with us....i can leave my daughter with her grandmother when i go to work or school...But strangley enough hubby and i can never leave her at home and go for a couple's night out...we feel kinda guilty about that...I guess cause we are out all day anyways and evenings are the only time we have to spend some quality time with her...
yeah i dn't think thsi concept of "babystiters" exists in pakistan. At least hte people i've known, they will NEVER leave their children, even with the relatives they live with, while they go out and relax by themselves.
We have no concept of enjoying life without our family, because family is our life. If we go out to eat , go out for a dawat , or any kind of fun activity the kids will go with us. It is only if we need to go to a doctor , hospital or any other kind of non fun thing then we leave the kids with Friends.
These answers are lovely - but do not address the question....
we too have never gone out without our kids. we further do not have friends that we'd leave our kids with so if I have to go to doc or something then my hubs takes time off. I STILL havent had my post-natal checkup after the birth of my youngest and he's now 4 years old lol!!! But that too is beside the point....
When I was young, it was a common thing to have a babysitter once in a while. And the babysitters were typically between the ages of 12 and 15. I was one myself and I made some nice money watching local little ones. But in this day and age, if your kids are alone with someone of that age and something goes wrong, the parents end up in jail I think. For neglect. Its a lovely thing if you have friends or family nearby who are amenable to little children but what do you do when thats not the case? WOULD you hire a girl-scout certified babysitter? Would you consider a parent neglectful for using such a one?
OK, talk to people you know who live closeby if they have any kids at home 12 and above who would be interested in making some extra $. Summer vacation is coming up so they'll be free. Once you interview a few candidates, invite them for an hour to your home and supervise them, and observe how well they handle your kids and how your kids react. After a couple of visits, kids would be comfortable, and you will be able to find out who is best suited for your child.
I leave my kids with babysitters quite often and they have a great time. Leave emergency numbers and call the sitter every now and then in between, you'll see that things turn out quite well.
Teenagers of present age are not as responsible and skilled as they used to be 20 or 30 years ago, most of them are only interested in their TV programmes, I have two teenage female cousins (age 14 and 16) and I can't think of leaving my children with them.
Hareem I think you're right about teens being less responsible these days. I'd never use a teenager as a babysitter but when I was a teen, it was a very common thing. And it was a very good thing for us teens - we learned responsibility and earned a little money. TImes have changed so dramatically in such a short time that I bet the girl scouts dont even have a "babysitting" badge anymore.
^ What about leaving your kids alone , when the eldest is at a certain age? I"ve never thought about it, but does the same problem (of responsibility) exist as with teenage babysitters?
I'm sure it does, sara. I mean, these days with my boys? I think I'd not leave them alone till they were at least 16. Not because they arent responsible but because of the big difference in society, kwim? Even at the age of 15 or 16 if something bad happened then the parents are toast. So I doubt that I'd ever leave them without a responsible adult in charge until they themselves are legally considered adults. I was just wondering about how others felt about this whole thing and whether I'm being overprotective once again!
maybe it depends on the child themselves if they're mature or not? My uncle and aunt often leave their 4 kids alone. the eldest (who will be 15 soon) has alot more priveleges and freedoms than i ever did at that age..and with good reason, she's smart, very mature, religious, wears hijab etc. so she's more responsible. whereas I know that when i was 15,, i was nowhere near as responsible or anything.. (whose fault that is...ehhhhhhhh..
I think its more due to being a much more protective society these days, kwim? When I was small, my mother would send us kids outside to play and all the other kids in the neighborhood would come out to play. Moms would chat out the sidewalks from time to time or check on us from the windows but it was much freer back then. These days, you call and arrange play-dates where an adult is right on top of the kids the whole time. No babysitters unless all the references are checked and checked again. No leaving the teenagers alone etc. Its a really huge change from what I had hoped my kids would be able to have. You adapt and all that but it isnt really what I had pictured for my kids. Maybe things are different in more rural areas but here in suburbia, everyone fears so much for their kids.
