Asking your partner about education-related decisions...

soconfused · October 6, 2011, 3:18am

Re: Asking your partner about education-related decisions…

my mother has set a very different example with this respect

my dad did his masters and doctorate after marriage

here’s the sequence:
-marriage and my dad has 14 siblings so there was that obligation too

mom gives birth to two sons in pakistan

off to germany for his masters

mom gives birth to twins

back to pakistan

off to japan for his doctorate

mom gives birth to another son

so in total during their scholarship times they had anywhere between 2-5 sons to raise and themselves to take care off all on scholarship money

my mom supported my dad’s decisions on whatever degree he wanted to pursue whenever he wanted to pursue it…for his betterment…her philosophy was not only would it make my dad happy and allow him to achieve his goals she would benefit from his success as well..

in 2008 my dad graduated with his second masters…my dad had only wanted to take one or two classes but my mother pushed/motivated him into the degree program because she knew it would be good for him

and in turn he (my father) has supported her in her goals too …

but what i am trying to get at is thats what IMO a life partner is someone who supports you in achieving your goals rather than someone who dissuades you from doing it

i dunno right now your friends hubby wants to do it…i say she should let him to do it in fact support him…because he is enthusiastic about it right now…a few years down the line when she thinks it is the right time…he may not be motivated by that time anymore…like i said a life partner should be supportive

its not gonna be easy considering the family and financial obligations but nothing worth having is easy anyways …n even though its not easy its not impossible to manage

I completely agree. My friends that are married and had spouses that supported their decision to go for higher education are the HAPPIEST. One friend is in a long distance marriage after living w/ her husband for 4 years because he really encouraged her to fulfill her goal of medical school and she is SO happy, aH. Their marriage and relationship is one that I would want to emulate. Even though at first glance their situation seems sucky: both live in 2 diff countries, students loans, age (can’t have kids yet cuz of school), this isn’t an issue at all for them