Re: Arranged Marriages…
I dont know about hate but I was forced and blackmailed into marrying someone who I didn’t like and had never thought of as a husband. But within less than a year we were inseperable. It was with great difficulty that I left him in Pak to come back to UK. I totally fell in love with him. It all depends on the way he treats you and the respect he shows you and that won me over.
Hate can turn to love… :love::love:
Re: Arranged Marriages....
All the blackmail and force was from my family. His family was unaware until after the marriage. His family are the best as well.
Re: Arranged Marriages....
some couples who have had an arranged marriage can end up falling in love with each other. I've personally seen that happen with some couples. So saying that ALL ends up that way is a generalization...no?
I never said they dont fall in love.. yeah they do.. but its forced love.. you're spending every day with this guy.. and the whole world is treating you like a couple.. and you're having sex with him.. and going for dinners and vacations with him.. ofcourse slowly you will 'fall in love'... I'm just saying its forced love..
Re: Arranged Marriages....
I never said they dont fall in love.. yeah they do.. but its forced love.. you're spending every day with this guy.. and the whole world is treating you like a couple.. and you're having sex with him.. and going for dinners and vacations with him.. ofcourse slowly you will 'fall in love'... I'm just saying its forced love..
but why label it as such...love is love...right?
Re: Arranged Marriages....
^^ nah ! that arranged marriage forced love is different.. its a compromise..
shudnt b in the same bracket as when ppl date around and fall in love with a bf and wanto spend the rest of their lives with him and then work things out.. thats different than forcing urself to love this person your parents chose for you and you superficially approved of.
Re: Arranged Marriages....
^^ nah ! that arranged marriage forced love is different.. its a compromise.. shudnt b in the same bracket as when ppl date around and fall in love with a bf and wanto spend the rest of their lives with him and then work things out.. thats different than forcing urself to love this person your parents chose for you and you superficially approved of.
at the end of the day...it's how content and happy one is with their marriage..that's all that matters. Like I said before...there are many people that fall in love...get married...but they are still not happy.
Either way....it's a gamble. Which is precisely why I am open to both.
Re: Arranged Marriages....
I never said regular marriages will b more successfull than arranged marriages.. ofcourse sumtimes the compromise situation leads to more happiness and content.. n all that.. i'm just saying .. whtvr it is.. its forced love !
We can all have our opinions ofcourse.
Re: Arranged Marriages…
Thanx Tabussum, thats what I needed to hear 
Re: Arranged Marriages....
That's FORCED LOVE.. Compromise.
Call it what you want. I'm happy and I wouldnt leave him for the world.
Re: Arranged Marriages....
Have you watched Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam?.... In the end she stays with the guy she was forced to marry cos she saw how much he cared for her and respected her. She fell in love with him.
Re: Arranged Marriages....
I know its only a movie but it does happen. I think its so romantic falling in love with someone when you dont have to meet in secret and you dont have any limitations. It's so much fun!!
Re: Arranged Marriages....
There IS hope for arranged marraiges....oh my gosh I just had a conversation with this hispanic guy and an Indian guy at work about it, because apparently the indian guy Badri had an arranged married, and he said he met his wife on 3 hours before saying yes!! Of course we were shocked but he said you just see if she is decent/her family is good, she talks well....and his key was you MUST be willing to compromise and work together on making marriage work....no matter what, they go in thinking divorce is not an option, so they find ways to make it work. Now the part that freaks me out...he said if there are issues..."THEN U INVOLVE FAMILY, to advise" ....wow that is like a battle waiting to happen..hehe poor B...but really he is such a sweet and cute guy, like a chota bhai to me, so innocent ....so for him im sure its working out well...he wouldn't hurt a fly