A voyeur is someone who gains pleasure from watching sensual related acts, usually in secrecy. Similar to a peeping-tom.
So I am having a discussion with a relative of mine about why people like to watch kissing and whatever else they show on television that is related to that. The point came up that people are voyeurs and don’t like to admit they are voyeurs. So my question was, if people like to watch it on television, why do they complain when they see it in person? For example, you see someone kissing on the street and you think to yourself, “they need to seriously get a room, GROSS.” Why do people think its okay to watch it on television and not in person? Why isn’t it gross both times/ways? I’ve never understood what people get out of watching such things on television. I mean you wouldn’t want to see people you know doing that on TV so why do you like to see total strangers do it? Can this be classified as voyeurism or peeping tom behavior? Do you like to watch such things on television? It seems that kids start watching that at an early age, and then think its fine.
Why do people say I am immature or childish because I don’t like to see this? Is it maturity to like to watch sensual acts of others? Do you think society has been conditioned to think this is acceptable to do in public/private? People often complain of public displays of affection but will gladly watch private displays in their homes on television. Does this count as hypocrisy or no? I just want to get some input about this, I realize that many people like to watch. From those that do, I’d like to know what you get out of it and if you think of yourself as a voyeur. Thanks.
p.s. People can be voyeuristic in many ways, but I am talking about this particular subject/topic. I dont know if this topic has been brought up before.
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*Originally posted by MehnazQ: *
I think a lot of people are voyeurs ... part of why reality t.v. is so popular. People like to 'watch'.
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The term voyeur doesnt have to refer to sexual pleasure, but it often is associated with deriving it from watching others. I'd like to know what people get out of watching it on television, what sort of images or thoughts come to mind? And do people find it acceptable to see that in person, as on television. I dont want explicit details, but just a general idea.
oh I know it isn't just about sexual pleasure which is why I mentioned reality t.v. If you think about it, all you are doing when watching these reality t.v. based shows is watching other people in their everyday lives. It's immensely popular cause the general population likes to watch. Kind of like that movie, 'The Truman Show' where everybody was taking a peek into his life.
As for sexually, I have no clue. I was talking about non-sexual voyeurism.
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*Originally posted by MehnazQ: *
oh I know it isn't just about sexual pleasure which is why I mentioned reality t.v. If you think about it, all you are doing when watching these reality t.v. based shows is watching other people in their everyday lives. It's immensely popular cause the general population likes to watch. Kind of like that movie, 'The Truman Show' where everybody was taking a peek into his life.
As for sexually, I have no clue. I was talking about non-sexual voyeurism.
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True, the reason I stated that was just in general, and yes people do seem to be fascinated by others lives. I was reading that there is this tremendous growth in reality based t.v. programs. But I really want to know about what people think about the voyeurism of the type I mentioned above. i.e. kissing, etc.
Firstly reality tv is crap. Its a waste of time. I havent seen a single reality tv show. Btw if you truely want to mess this up watching TV or a movie itself is a voyeuristic tendency as you watching the lives of make believe characters and gaining pleasure from their truimphs. Thus watching anything even 2 birds singing is voyeuristic.
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*Originally posted by CM: *
Firstly reality tv is crap. Its a waste of time. I havent seen a single reality tv show. Btw if you truely want to mess this up watching TV or a movie itself is a voyeuristic tendency as you watching the lives of make believe characters and gaining pleasure from their truimphs. Thus watching anything even 2 birds singing is voyeuristic.
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That is why I stated my "p.s." smile Again, I'd like to target the specific thing I mentioned. Your thoughts on that?
I’d say people do it out of morbid curiosity.It’s like watching a train wreck in slow motion or that overwhelming urge you feel to have a look when passing a car accident on the highway
Great question Munni.
Now you have me wondering exactly why people like to watch.
In reference to the public display of affection issue, I'd like to believe that there is an unwritten law that says it is impolite to watch something as personal and intimate as a sexual exchange so when it happens openly, people get uncomfortable. They have no issues when it is "forced" upon them on television because hey, it's being broadcast, what should they do? Look away?
On the other hand, it could simply be....I want some of that!
;)
i dont think its a matter of private versus public because scenes in movies are fairly common where the couple are doing it in public. my guess is that when you're watching a movie since you place yourself above the circle of lives of these people.. since you're watcing from above.. you can manage to identify with whatever part of the scene the director wants you to identify with. for example, a hero kicks a dwarf in the crotch. if we werent focused on how hilarious the context and the hero's smile is, we might actually look at the dwarf and his pain and humiliation. i guess some management is required on the part of the director to ensure that we focus on the savory bits, and dont exactly get to see the more disgusting parts.
outside we have all sorts of concerns that distract us from the voyeurism of it.. feeling personally threatened, having a sense of modesty as to what (your) society might think.. some aesthetically displeasing aspects of the persons involved. apart from that I doubt public displays of real life immodesty are inherently displeasing to the voyeur. other way round actually. reality tv sprung from the fascination a lot of people had with hidden camera footage..
Muzna, thats precisely why I want to know. I'm surprised no guppy has come forward stating they like to watch it and why. I'm guessing atleast one person does! The other thing is, for those that want to be a part of the action, is it that they want to be a part of the action with the actors involved or they just imagine themselves with someone else. What sort of feelings does it trigger that so many people like it? And again, why dont ppl get that same feeling "in person"?
ravage, I can understand that voyeurs may have no problem with seeing it if society wasnt so against PDA's. However, I am really talking about the people who like to watch it on television and then will tell someone to "get a room" when they do it in public, because they think its gross. Is it only the fact that its "live" that its gross? What is the case? This is what I'd like to know, among other things.
Please excuse me for being so intrigued by this, but I am just curious. I dont mean to be weird. afsoos
I like to watch it..go ahead call me a sicko..but I don't want to be told "you don't know how to kiss"... they're just live or boradcasted "tutorials"... plus when you're at the stage when you feel the need to have a companion to have and to hold, then it's like when you see a cute lil baby and you say "ohh I wish I was a mommy". Same way you see to people engrossed in intimate interaction and you just feel the need to have some of it as well.
I complain whether its on TV or on the street.I mean a bit of affection is alright.But when people start making out next to you on the bus ,park or whatever.Those type need to get a room.As for TV and all, I dont watch much to start with and I hate all the making out scenes; they're pointless.I Never watch them.
Me being the utter chauvinist that i am, i absolutely loathe a romantic scene in a movie. But then Mel Brooks has a way of making these scenes good. Anyway every time there is a romantic scene on a dvd or tv and if i am alone i just forward it or change the channel. I find romantic scenes utterly disgusting.
Secondly i dont watch any sort of romantic movie. Action/thriller/comedy those are the genres i watch. Also Tv soaps or borderline soaps like 7th Heaven dont watch either.
As for people making out if they are really going at it i have the urge to hand out hotel business cards. So far i havent done it. I mind my own business and keep to myself in public. Never stare at anyone or do anything of the sort.
LK, I am not about to call anyone a sicko because they like to watch this stuff. I know many ppl that do. I understand that not everyone is going to think like I do. Not to mention the fact that I have my own thoughts that may not be angelic to others. It's just an understanding that I want to have, which is why I posted this. smile
There are a few points/questions to my post. However I will just mention one of them. What I have noticed is that some girls dont like for their boyfriends or husbands to look at other women when they are with them, much less do they want their significant other to start daydreaming about the opposite sex. But then these same girls will watch a romantic scene on t.v. and imagine themselves with the actor, and feel this is perfectly harmless. Why get offended when the boyfriend looks at other women in that case? Is it not similar if its on t.v. or in person? It's still another person being thought of. I hope I am making sense.
Why do people say I am immature or childish because I don’t like to see this?
Women might not be as visual of creatures as men. I’m not sure..is that a possibility? Reading LK, I highly doubt it. :-D Men like to watch…even god (not kaka) has said “mominoN nighaiN neechi rakho”…I wonder why.
*Is it maturity to like to watch sensual acts of others? Do you think society has been conditioned to think this is acceptable to do in public/private? *
Which society are we talking about..Western /Eastern..nude beaches? All societies have their own perceptions which should be respected. I don’t think it has anything to do with maturity. It would be quite odd if you stroll in shalwar kameez at a nude beach.
*People often complain of public displays of affection but will gladly watch private displays in their homes on television. Does this count as hypocrisy or no? *
No, it doesn’t. I wish it were black and white. There are different reasons to why people complain. From keeping the environment clean for their children to respecting eachother’s rights as a society.
We can also say, people are supposed to take shower in their bathrooms; there is nothing stopping them from taking a nude bath on the street. It’s just a matter of giving respect to others. There is no hypocrisy.
ahh Munni well…for me when I see people in some intimate grasp I don’t imagine myself wih that man…rather it’s “wow I wish I could do that with my man” (whenever God grants me one )
And it’s not the thought of being with that person or actor..more of how WHAT they are doing would feel if I were to do it… I don;t care if it’s Tom Cruise or some stranger on the street engrossed in a kiss..when I see it I just think “Damn it! Mera number kab ayega!” Till then I can enjoy watching and imagining.
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