So, I have been thinking about this for some time in regards to a person I know. Let’s just call her AA to make it easy.
She is so judgemental towards her friend, even to the point of calling her a wh@**, because said friend-let’s just say, had a good time with AA’s cousin and a mutual friend. THAT IS THE ONLY REASON.
However, the fact that AA has been with over 10 different guys - to um, have a good time, in within a 3 month period, doesn’t seem to be alarming nor a wh@** status. How did she complete this task you may ask? By going to bars/restaurants, and just mingling with them enough to go home with them at the end of the night, and never see them again afterwards.
And just the other day, she goes “see how different we (meaning desi people) are, we are not like these goris who pick up guys at public places just to have fun for a night, we are classy” . I was shocked that she said that. CLASSY??? In what world are her actions classy?!
Is AA that obvlious to the fact that that’s exactly what she has been doing ever since I have known her? and also oblivious to the fact that she can call her other friend nasty names, but doesn’t realize she has the done same thing but on a completely higher magnitude?
Re: Are people really this oblivious of themselves?
We all are guilty of being oblivious at times. Jog your memory. Some time in the past you have criticized a person for something that you have also done and you may have realized this later. Or if you can't recall such a time, then at some point in the future you will find yourself censuring someone for a mistake that either you have committed or will commit. If AA is doing this often, you can either talk to her about it....or change the subject so she sees you're not interested.....or you can say something positive about the person she gossips about if you happen to know them...or drop her as a friend if her habit is excessive.
Re: Are people really this oblivious of themselves?
I'm not saying I am perfect and don't make mistakes. This is strictly about how sometimes people judge others for the same exact thing they do themselves. And that is not fair. Tit for tit, and tat for tat. That is all I'm saying.
the same can be said about anything.. for example, the person who goes around preaching to everyone to be a better person and pray etc, yet they themselves don't do it.. or who criticize others for wearing inappropriate clothing, yet they were the same inappropriate clothing themselves.
Re: Are people really this oblivious of themselves?
^We all contradict ourselves, it's just that the degree varies and some people are more aware of it than others. I never said that you are perfect. The reason why I brought up this tendency of human nature is so that the realization might take some of the edge off your anger. Like I said earlier, you have several options. If you choose to stay friends, you can opt to stay silent or do something about. If you want to remain silent...then either let it go in one ear and out the other...or you can keep on dwelling and fuming about it. If you decide to do something about it, you can choose to call her out directly, or give subtle hints or reminders. Or you can drop her as a friend.
Re: Are people really this oblivious of themselves?
Yes, I see what you mean. Thank you.
And for now, I have been quiet about it. If I say anything, it would turn into an unnecessary fight, cuz again, this person doesn't realize what she is doing. Quiet is the way to go, but it does irritate me. But taking what you said about the realization, does help with the anger/frustration
Re: Are people really this oblivious of themselves?
Is AA that obvlious to the fact that that's exactly what she has been doing ever since I have known her? and also oblivious to the fact that she can call her other friend nasty names, but doesn't realize she has the done same thing but on a completely higher magnitude?
Yes, there are many people like this out there. Be glad you don't know more.
I'm not saying I am perfect and don't make mistakes. This is strictly about how sometimes people judge others for the same exact thing they do themselves. And that is not fair. Tit for tit, and tat for tat. That is all I'm saying.
Life itself is not fair.
Re: Are people really this oblivious of themselves?
I just think it's funny how one can criticize others when said person is doing the SAME exact thing, if not worse at that current time too
Re: Are people really this oblivious of themselves?
I have been with AAA for 15 years and my begum never had a problem with that. Oh wait…damn…
PS: On serious note *we are excellent judge for others, and excellent lawyer for ourselves *