Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

[sweefs]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

actuallyyyyy, it would count reasonable if you actually expanded that answer

yeah

[Light_Bearer]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

@hareem01

i only gave 1 big reason violence through games] out of hundreds of reasons of inbalance of child behaviour..............and i'm not blaming children for their behaviour or actions.

May I know how old are you?

I agree 100% with you on the behaviour of children getting worst and worst day by day because of the violence shown through different media and it's the parents fault as they need to know what their children are looking at.

Regarding end of time theory: it's not rocket science if the violence will increase in the world the world will eventually come to an end.

[hareem01]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

@Light_Bearer

I agree 100% with you on the behaviour of children getting worst and worst day by day because of the violence shown through different media and it's the parents fault as they need to know what their children are looking at.

Well, thanks for agreeing.

@Light_Bearer

Regarding end of time theory: it's not rocket science if the violence will increase in the world the world will eventually come to an end.

No, its not rocket science...........but we all know this world will end one day according to Quran and hadith and according to science.

Anyway, I am not going to force you to believe in hadith. take care.

[inzi_rocks]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

Society is changing and us kids can’t be blamed for the way that we are today. It’s up to our elders to teach us about cultural and social values. We can’t be expected to learn about that in school. Today, there’s more of a need for freedom for us youngsters. It’s hard for us to grow up in a multi-cultural society and yet to be expected by our grandparents etc to behave as they did in their time.

Yes, they may have had better manners but in regards to the society that we are growing up in, in comparison to the way they grew up, that is only what is expected.

[hareem01]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

@inzi_rocks

Yes, they may have had better manners but in regards to the society that we are growing up in, in comparison to the way they grew up, that is only what is expected.

One thing that you can do to make the situation of society better, act like grown ups. Dont feel sorry for yourself and dont assume that you are still a kid.

[inzi_rocks]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

@hareem01

One thing that you can do to make the situation of society better, act like grown ups. Dont feel sorry for yourself and dont assume that you are still a kid.

Well we try to, but the fact remains that we ARE kids and that's what we are treated like. It's one thing for us to act like adults but another for adults to treat us like themselves.

[hareem01]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

@inzi_rocks

Well we try to, but the fact remains that we ARE kids and that's what we are treated like. It's one thing for us to act like adults but another for adults to treat us like themselves.

thats true.

[cricketplaya]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

@inzi_rocks

Society is changing and us kids can’t be blamed for the way that we are today. It’s up to our elders to teach us about cultural and social values. We can’t be expected to learn about that in school. Today, there’s more of a need for freedom for us youngsters. It’s hard for us to grow up in a multi-cultural society and yet to be expected by our grandparents etc to behave as they did in their time.

Yes, they may have had better manners but in regards to the society that we are growing up in, in comparison to the way they grew up, that is only what is expected.

I agree.

As a teen myself (19), I see this pattern increasing day by day… I live in a city where there’s so much multiculturalism and with that you get social values from all corners of the world. Bad manners too. The parents are responsible of bringing up their kids, not the teachers. Islam says it’s fard upon the parent to bring their kids on the straight path. Islam teaches good manners. Islam teaches everything that we need.

Let me give you an example.. I socialize with teens (obviously) in college, community gatherings, masjids and in sport events. Let me give you an example of one group: MUSLIMS. You will see kids spitting on the street and then you will see kids walking with humbleness. Then when you observe where these two spend most of their time; one spends his time in the environment of good mannered people (ie: masjids, msas, HOME) then you will have that kid who spends his free time at clubs, with the opposite sex, on the streets late at night..etc Which one do you think will have respect for his/her parents? It’s common sense.

Finally, you guys should now realize what I wanted to say.. Stay in an Islamic environment and stay away from useless “fun”. For those who say, “you have to be part of the society..” you can be part of the society and STILL be a Muslim. But if your a weak person like I then it is hard for us to be in that society because you never know when that can overcome your being Muslim. Iman needs to be strong before anything. May Allah make us strong. Ameen.

Here is a nice read that I had found not long ago:

The Company One Keeps

Imam ‘Abdallah ibn ‘Alawi al-Haddad-may Allah bless his soul-mentioned in his kitab, al-Fusul al-’Ilmiyya wa’l-Usul al-Hikamiyya (Knowledge and Wisdom):

The company one keeps has major effects. It may lead either to benefit and improvement or to harm and corruption, depending on whether the company is that of pure and eminent people or people who are depraved and evil. This effect does not appear suddenly, but is a gradual process that unfolds with time. The Messenger of God, may blessings and peace be upon him, said, “A man will be with his companions.” And, “A man’s religion is that of his intimates, so let each of you consider who he becomes intimate with.” He also said:

A virtuous companion is like the merchant of musk. Either he will offer you some, you will buy it from him, or you will find him pleasant to smell. But an evil companion is like the bellows-blower, either he will scorch your clothes or you will receive a rotten smell from him.

If you wish to know whether those you mix and sit with increase or diminish your faith, religion, and actions, compare your state with regard to good character, praiseworthy intentions, resolution in performing acts of obedience, and goodness before and after their companionship. If you find that these acts have become stronger and more firmly established and that you have become more desirous of and interested in them, then know that this particular company is of benefit to your religion and your heart, and that if you continue with it you will gain even greater benefits and acquire many more good things, God willing. If, on the other hand, you find that your religion has grown weaker and shakier, know that this company is harmful, that its harm to your religion and your heart is evident, and that if you continue with it it will lead to even greater harm and evil, may God protect us! You should also compare the bad points you had before and after keeping that company. This is the way to evaluate one’s position vis-a-vis those with whom one mixes and takes for one’s companions. The decisive factor here is whether good or evil is more powerful and predominant. When goodness in that company is more powerful and predominant, then a wicked man who mixes with them may become attracted to goodness and its people; whereas when wickedness prevails and dominates, then it is to be feared that the good people who keep such company may become attracted to wickedness and its people.

These are subtle concepts known to people possessed of discernment and who have experience in such matters. [The Prophet] said, may blessings and peace be upon him, ” A good companion is better that solitude, and solitude is better than a wicked companion.” [The Prophet], may blessings and peace be upon him, was given a comprehensiveness of expression that no other man, whether of ancient or of recent times, was ever given.

[sweefs]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

@hareem01

One thing that you can do to make the situation of society better, act like grown ups. Dont feel sorry for yourself and dont assume that you are still a kid.

welllllll, erm ur not in ur 13-18's right?....and when u were am sure situations were very different........i'm telling u now yeah that sometimes when we DO try to act like grown ups its said "acha acha ziyada baray banay ki koshish na karo"......so they expect us to act like kids and then say werr batameez?.....im sure that u've thought some kids are batameez too :)

[inzi_rocks]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

welllllll, erm ur not in ur 13-18's right?....and when u were am sure situations were very different........i'm telling u now yeah that sometimes when we DO try to act like grown ups its said "acha acha ziyada baray banay ki koshish na karo"......so they expect us to act like kids and then say werr batameez?.....im sure that u've thought some kids are batameez too :)

That's so true

[sweefs]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

cricketplaya - ur 19?!? woahhh

i thought u were like some 32 yr old religious person (not a mullah)

[inzi_rocks]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

Cricketplaya - Yeah I totally agree with you; before anything else our Imaan has to be strong.

Personally I have noticed more than anything that our elders (the minority; old nagging women) want us to listen to them and expect us to act upon their every command. I don't mean to be rude but I really do not think that we should have to do that to be seen as good-mannered kids. As long as we have fear of our Creator, InshaAllah we won't stray from the straight path and will be successful in life. However, although the majority of youngsters respect their elders as Islam teaches us to do, many of the elders want us to be scared of them. In todays society I do not think that this is realistic.

[hareem01]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

welllllll, erm ur not in ur 13-18's right?....and when u were am sure situations were very different........i'm telling u now yeah that sometimes when we DO try to act like grown ups its said "acha acha ziyada baray banay ki koshish na karo"......so they expect us to act like kids and then say werr batameez?.....im sure that u've thought some kids are batameez too :)

Let me remind you that you are not a ' kid ' anymore............You are an adult.

InshaAllah I will not allow my children to consider themselves as ' kids ' after the age of 7.
You can remind your parents that Ali(ra) accepted Islam when he was 10 year old and he was considered a companion of the Prophet(SAW). And that allowing you to take responsibility now will make you better at handling it in future inshaAllah.

[hareem01]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

@sweet.i.f

cricketplaya - ur 19?!? woahhh

i thought u were like some 32 yr old religious person (not a mullah)

You see…even I thought he was 25.

[hareem01]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

Cricketplaya - Yeah I totally agree with you; before anything else our Imaan has to be strong.

Personally I have noticed more than anything that our elders (the minority; old nagging women) want us to listen to them and expect us to act upon their every command. I don't mean to be rude but I really do not think that we should have to do that to be seen as good-mannered kids. As long as we have fear of our Creator, InshaAllah we won't stray from the straight path and will be successful in life. However, although the majority of youngsters respect their elders as Islam teaches us to do, many of the elders want us to be scared of them. In todays society I do not think that this is realistic.

Obedience of our elders is fear of Allah.

[cricketplaya]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

Cricketplaya - Yeah I totally agree with you; before anything else our Imaan has to be strong.

Personally I have noticed more than anything that our elders (the minority; old nagging women) want us to listen to them and expect us to act upon their every command. I don't mean to be rude but I really do not think that we should have to do that to be seen as good-mannered kids. As long as we have fear of our Creator, InshaAllah we won't stray from the straight path and will be successful in life. However, although the majority of youngsters respect their elders as Islam teaches us to do, many of the elders want us to be scared of them. In todays society I do not think that this is realistic.

I disagree, we should listen to our elders except when their sayings go against Islam, then we should stop listening to them at that point.

Your right we should fear our Allah! Ameen.

[inzi_rocks]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

Hareem :-There's an extent to which I would obey my elders. If they expect me to do something which I know that my religion doesn't, then why should I obey them? **
**Yes, I fear Allah, and because of that I respect my elders.

[cricketplaya]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

^There's an extent to which I would obey my elders. If they expect me to do something which I know that my religion doesn't, then why should I obey them? ** **Yes, I fear Allah, and because of that I respect my elders.

Your absolutely right.

[inzi_rocks]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

Your absolutely right.

Yeah....:) These are obviously just my views,.....other kids of my age probably feel differently but this is the way I see it.

[Hum_Hain_Lajawab]

Re: Are kids today more ill-mannered than they were in previous generations?

Hareem :-There's an extent to which I would obey my elders. If they expect me to do something which I know that my religion doesn't, then why should I obey them? ** **Yes, I fear Allah, and because of that I respect my elders.

Yes you are right. If they tell you to do something which is against Islam, then you should not listen and should rather advice them and if they do not understand at that specific moment, then try not to talk back because when we are angry at anyone, the decisions often taken are whispers of Shaitan. Allah (Azzu Wajal) values parents greatly in Quran and he mentions in many places "the mother who carried you for 9 months".........."the mother who bore pain for you" etc etc.........I know it's hard for us ('us' meaning people like me in general, not you or anyone else) to understand this but we will understand this when we have our own kids and when the time repeats itself.

As for acting mature, then that should always be looked as a positive thing rather than negative because maturity does not occur at specific age, a 16 yr old teens can sometimes act more mature than a 25 yr old person. An example is Usamah (R.A - the Son of Zaid)....When his father Zaid (R.A) died in another land...Muhammad (S.A.W) chose his son Usamah to lead the Army. He was what, like only around 17 at that time. Many senior sahabas were concerned and objected by saying that an experienced person should rather replace Usamah. However the decision remained and Usamah came back to Madinah with Victory....but you can see from here that a person can be mature even at young age and it is not a bad thing. Being mature at young age does not mean that you cannot enjoy life and/or play around the way you normally would at that age :)