Re: Anyone here decide NOT to have children after marriage?
I know of two couples who have decided not to have kids and are sticking to their decision so far.
their reasoning .... they simply do not like children. Period.
here is the odd part. One woman is an OBGYN and the other is a pediatrician.
Re: Anyone here decide NOT to have children after marriage?
If you're destined to have kids...then you'll have em....even if you don't want to. We're not the ones who'll be raising for or paying for another person's child......so live and let live.
Re: Anyone here decide NOT to have children after marriage?
they simply do not like children. Period.
here is the odd part. One woman is an OBGYN and the other is a pediatrician.
Maybe that's why.
Re: Anyone here decide NOT to have children after marriage?
I can't imagine my life without kids and like jafri says, its all worth it. I have had 4 painful births, had to use crutches cos I wasn't able to take the pain in my pelvis and have lost 2 teeth due to excessive breastfeeding. I would do it all again in an instance. I don't care about my figure, it's not like Im going to wear a bikini or imodest clothes.
But yes, like zara says, each to their own. I just think also that under Islamic law, it's not permissible as there is a hadith that says '...a house without children is a house unblessed ' Children are a great source of joy.
what? you lost 2 teeth because of breastfeeding? how come?
Re: Anyone here decide NOT to have children after marriage?
Do you guys think its a good idea then to have kids just because its reccomended in Islam even if you don't really want them?
Re: Anyone here decide NOT to have children after marriage?
I thought you get married because you want to start a family and raise kids. :S
Re: Anyone here decide NOT to have children after marriage?
I agree with redvelvet...if a couple dont want children** who are we to judge?..**
If its meant to happen, it probably will, if its not, it wont.
And I dont agree that the only (or main) reason to get married is to have children.
To each their own
Re: Anyone here decide NOT to have children after marriage?
I love children, and honestly spend a lot of my time with them. I've even worked with children with disabilities and special needs and thats my field as well. But I don't want children of my own, like it scares me to death. I know my finace does want children and if Allah wills, I will have children of my own but if I had it my own way, i wouldn't. I feel bad that I feel this way because I know so many couples who suffer because they can't have children of their own, so it is a blessing forsure.
I fear becoming a burden on my children
Re: Anyone here decide NOT to have children after marriage?
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kakaballi
Re: Anyone here decide NOT to have children after marriage?
I thought you get married because you want to start a family and raise kids. :S
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Yes... going way back I think the purpose of marriage was mostly to reproduce, but things have changed. Now people want to get married to enjoy companionship with someone they feel they're compatible with, hence the whole looking for a 'spark' concept. I think for the older generations this wasn't such a big deal because it was expected that you get married, have kids, the man works, wife takes care of kids and home, etc... roles were very much defined; decisions were lite rally based on who would be a good mother/father to my future children.
In today's world though everyone's looking to enjoy relationships by really connecting with someone on multiple levels, women feel they can contribute to society as well through the workforce and not just with the traditional boundaries of homemaking. Yet there still seems to be a pressure from society that if you don't want to have kids thats just completely out of whack (again in the west its become more acceptable, still not so much in the east). I'm sure the majority of people in this world want to have kids but for the minority who don't, I feel thats really their choice, and whatever their reasons are they shouldn't be admonished for them because its their life.