I have my own dukhi story here
I need help on how to keep my mouth shut to my wonderful husband about the weird thngs i saw happening at his place to me
Mymil n sil r a bit weird to me .i dont show them my disapproval but tell my husbnd every lil thing i hate n he listens to me v patiently
My mom said to me keep ur moutj shut during the first yr of marriage but i cant seem tp do tht.am i doing wrong ??
Need help
I just got married ths feb.currently in pak cuz of visa n nic processing n hubby in oman .
Let me just ask you this, your husband is in Oman, you’re in Pakistan with inlaws. You tell your husband everything your SIL and MIL does which is weird. Now let’s reverse this one, let’s say you were in Oman and hubby kept saying every tiny bit to you about your family, how would you feel? Let’s top that one with the fact that he’s probably dead tired of work, living on his own, struggling with your visa and then he calls you aur instead of do meethe bol, you tell him what amma ji or baji ji did today. Do you see what I mean?
Please don’t come back and say you’re very loving on the phone as well. If someone told me every weird habit of my family - I’d not be in the mood for any romance.
Pick your battles. That patience, which he’s showering you with right now, doesn’t grow on trees plus what is he going to do from Oman? Actually the better question is what has he done with all your complaints?
Multi pe beht jaao aur go to Oman, Rather than (Putting it blunt) BicHing about the mans family Just afer one month… Just think whats Gona happen in a years time .. You ll be right back where you started except worse..
Every bahu is annoyed. Nothing new in it. Even your bhaabi will be annoyed same way with your mum and you. And now whatever you will say about you and your mom, your mil and sil think same way for themselves. ;)
Just keep it a bit on lower side. When you move in with him, it will all get easy. You can tell stories of what his mom/sis said to you on the phone :D
I understand that if one would have to live long in this situation (whatever you have), but your visa is in the process; so can't you just bear with it thinking that it's just for the nonce?
:( im not a bad girl guys but i take ur comments seriously! But see i cameback from isl yday .nobody askd me if im hungry or anything .i askd fr chai n i get old chai tht i hated.thn daal for khana who does tht
Plus my mom sent her a suit n she goes thank ur mom wen u talk to her.why cant she call her n thnk
She never sent her anything
I was really upset at all tht :(
:( im not a bad girl guys but i take ur comments seriously! But see i cameback from isl yday .nobody askd me if im hungry or anything .i askd fr chai n i get old chai tht i hated.thn daal for khana who does tht
Plus my mom sent her a suit n she goes thank ur mom wen u talk to her.why cant she call her n thnk
She never sent her anything
I was really upset at all tht :(
Okay a few things...firstly, did you ask your MIL to give you chai? That shouldn't have happened. Fine you might have come home from a long trip but at the end of the day she is your MIL and if she had made you chai and given to you on her own accord, that's a different story but if you actually ASKED her to make it for you well I'm not surprised you got old chai. Every MIL is different. There are some who will do whatever they can for their DIL but others who don't and expect the khidmath- from what you have posted, your MIL falls into this category so expecting her to make you fresh chai is really out of the question. My dadiami is different- when we are in Pakistan and come back from a long trip she will always have food ready and make tea for my mom etc, however, I know not every MIL is this way and you take what you get and adapt to it. But it is not your MIL's responsibility to make you tea- if she had, it would be nice but she isn't compelled to do so.
Secondly, what's wrong with daal? Do they specifically know you don't like daal? Who does the cooking? Do you have a cook or does your SIL do the cooking?
Thirdly, you said your MIL didn't send your mom anything- she doesn't have to. Yes it would have been nice if she had responded to your mom's gift with a gift back but she didn't so why let it bother you?
I guess the best advice I can give you is you are only living with your MIL until you get your visa- try to make the time pleasant and don't make a mountain out of a molehill on every single issue.
Thankyou guys .i m so thankful for u ppl to take time out n advicing me
Actually my moms like that.her ek ka bht khayal karna whoever comes over .she wud make special food n clean the room n stufff so i found all this v heartbreaking
My in laws came fr my baraat with a v bad dil cuz they wanted us to come lahore n we lived in isl n my parents saidthe groom fam shud come
She didnt welcome me wen i married hrr son .he also knows tht .my room was given to my sil hubby before i used my furniture .didnt talk to me two months bfr my wedding .nxt day of my shadi was also odd.she wasnt happy until we reached back to lhr .
:( im not a bad girl guys but i take ur comments seriously! But see i cameback from isl yday .nobody askd me if im hungry or anything .i askd fr chai n i get old chai tht i hated.thn daal for khana who does tht
Plus my mom sent her a suit n she goes thank ur mom wen u talk to her.why cant she call her n thnk
She never sent her anything
I was really upset at all tht :(
I was asked to share the washroom with all the guest n ghar wale wen i came .my bedroom attached bath had two doors.and not to forget the house has two other washrooms too
Sge never talked to my mom after shadi .my mom made efforts but taali ek hatg se tou nhi bajti.my husband loves me alot mashallah se but all this has really affected me deeply inside
I ve nobody to talk to cuz i dnt wanto bother my mom n sister .so i talk to my husband
plus what is he going to do from Oman? Actually the better question is what has he done with all your complaints?
pe beht jaao aur go to Oman, Rather than (Putting it blunt) BicHing about the mans family Just afer one month… Just think whats Gona happen in a years time .. You ll be right back where you started except worse..