A few days ago Saddam decided to promote a trusted Lieutenant named Habib to serve as a “right-hand man” to serve his every need in case of impending war. After informing Habib of his decision, Saddam gave him these instructions: “In case of attack I am to be handed my lucky rifle and red shirt.”
“Why a red shirt?” asked Habib. “That is so if the infidels should attack me and shoot me, my men won’t see the blood and will continue fighting to victory!” yelled Saddam.
“Wow, you’re a hero to us all!” exclaimed Habib.
Soon after, Saddam was out on his rooftop and saw the entire US and British forces in the air and on the ground. “Habib!”, he yelled. “Get me my lucky rifle and my red shirt.” After pausing to think, Saddam then whispered, “and my brown pants!”
“Two guys are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, ‘I slept with your mother!’”
The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the second guy will do.
"The first again yells, ‘I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!’
“The other says, 'Go home dad, you’re drunk.”’
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