Finally, good to see some brains on GS
And 100% agreed to your second conclusion as well.
Its all about mental ages… I am not talking about desis living in west, but in Pakistan, girls are generally more mature than guys of the same age considering all other things as equal. Hence, it is more appropriate to marry a girl 3-4 years younger than you.
Another perfectly good reason has to do with phyical maturity as well. I think that the same rule applies in this area as well. I have seen that girls mature physically at a slightly higher rate than guys. Hence, If you think about a couple of years down the road, it will be much more suitable if shes a little younger than the guy.
It is not the age, it is the maturity of mind which should matter.
Also, it should not matter if woman is older or man is older.
Having said that, most people marry only once or plan to marry only once in these days and age.
So biological difference may be in sight when people look for woman to be younger than man. There is no such thing as 'menopause' in men.
well said...i agree with two thirds of what you've written up here..
but what has 'menopause' got to do with marriage? i guess we all know that if it does anything is to stop the reproduction process as far as the woman is concerned, but it does not affect her in any other way. of course there are other changes but they are due to old age and which both men and women experience..and i think others will agree with me when i say marriage is not all about producing babies(ok i know how important they are to most)....
Because some parents believe that an older guy would be more mature, more dependable/reliable, stronger, and a better supporter.
AND ALSO..........I've even heard some women (desi moms) say that since women age faster.........it's better for a guy to marry a girl who is considerably younger as she will retain her youth longer. Isn't it interesting how it's usually the desi MOMS who perpetuate beliefs that are overall harmful for women?
They always say women age faster but these days women r so much into anti-aging that men age faster :) OK WF 7-8 is a bit too much n these aunties say that just to convince u to agree to any SILLY proposal they bring. but if a guy is tooo good otherwise 7-8 yrs is no big deal. his heart has to be young n mind has to be wise :)
Generally speaking, girls are seen as more mature for their years by about 2 years. Therefore an older guy is seen to be at the same maturity level as a girl about 2/3 years younger than him. Also, older guys tend to be financially stable and have a job/house etc and as girls generally get married younger it just seems to be a deal that works for most.
Difference in age makes a difference and matters prior to maturity. When you're still a "kid". Theres a HUGE difference between a 12 year old and a 17 year old yeah? But very little difference between a 40 year old and a 45 year old. Or even 30 and 35.
If you marry young then the age difference will make a huge difference but if you marry later on then not so much at all.
The age-old proven difference in maturity between boys and girls refers to grade school and to junior high. By age 15 or 16,things even out and boys even come out ahead.
And since we arent really talking about child-marriages here, I think that the age difference is more of a perceived problem than a real one.
Agree with Mo3. Age difference is much more a perceived problem than a real problem once you get into adulthood (mid-twenties and up), and in particular I don't see the problem with the girl being the older one of the couple. There are several years of difference between my husband and I (I'm the older one!), and I've never 'felt' it to be a problem. Likewise, a couple of his aunties are older than their husband's and they seem to have happy marriages.
Difference in age makes a difference and matters prior to maturity. When you're still a "kid". Theres a HUGE difference between a 12 year old and a 17 year old yeah? But very little difference between a 40 year old and a 45 year old. Or even 30 and 35.
If you marry young then the age difference will make a huge difference but if you marry later on then not so much at all.
The age-old proven difference in maturity between boys and girls refers to grade school and to junior high. By age 15 or 16,things even out and boys even come out ahead.
And since we arent really talking about child-marriages here, I think that the age difference is more of a perceived problem than a real one.
If the girl is younger and is hoping to carry on working after marriage and work her way up the career ladder then it can be an issue. The husband may want children and the wife may not yet be ready. Thus the age difference can be a problem.
From my experiences boys aged 15/16 tend to be very immature in comparison to girls of the same age.
