or say after your haan/engagement whether it was arranged or love, did anyone of you get a cold feet and started thinking if it was the right decision? Or worse just after few days you are attacked with all those thoughts, “Is he/she right for me”, “i could have done better”, “I dont want someone like that”, etc.
Please be honest.
If it did happen with you, what made you stay? Or what made get out of the commitement?.
p.s it’s not about me so don’t lecture me! :halo:
Re: After you said “YES”
These are just not mere doubts, esp the bold bit..tbh anyone who thinks the bold bit after the engagement is a douche 
Re: After you said "YES"
I think it would be natural to get cold feet....but I think it would be a stronger case of cold feet....where you still feel you don't know the other person well enough or where you haven't had many interactions to where you a feel a greater sense of comfort. But then people here will argue that interactions to get to know one another are a grave sin. So, I don't know where one would draw the line...differs for everyone.
Re: After you said "YES"
yes I had cold feet a lot of times. Till my nikkah to be exact :D I was like what am I landing myself into you. But after that not once I got any such feeling Alhmadullilah :)
Re: After you said "YES"
My parents got them..............they were so confused that they drove me mad and this continued till my walima.
and it was a totally arranged marriage except that i had dinner twice with my husband alone before we got engaged to get to know him better.
Re: After you said "YES"
I think it would be natural to get cold feet....but I think it would be a stronger case of cold feet....where you still feel you don't know the other person well enough or where you haven't had many interactions to where you a feel a greater sense of comfort. But then people here will argue that interactions to get to know one another are a grave sin. So, I don't know where one would draw the line...differs for everyone.
Yup. Sometimes you get to know too much about the other person and that may actually trigger those thoughts and sometimes lack of communication may do so. So its kinda weird.
yes I had cold feet a lot of times. Till my nikkah to be exact :D I was like what am I landing myself into you. But after that not once I got any such feeling Alhmadullilah :)
Haha, that's one more reason i think there should be no engagements only shadi. Shadi hogi phir kya cold feet kya hot feet :p.
Re: After you said "YES"
My parents got them..............they were so confused that they drove me mad and this continued till my walima.
and it was a totally arranged marriage except that i had dinner twice with my husband alone before we got engaged to get to know him better.
Awww. What happened? Share if you don't mind.
Re: After you said "YES"
After I said "yes", I realised I had made the biggest mistake of my life. Suicidal, I jumped off of a clif and then I woke up! :o
Re: After you said “YES”
Yup has happened and still happens sometimes.
what made me stay is my parents. they are fine so i am gonna act ok too
Re: After you said “YES”
Haha?
Next 
Re: After you said "YES"
Yup has happened and still happens sometimes.
what made me stay is my parents. they are fine so i am gonna act ok too
Hmm that's kinda sweet that you have so much faith and love for your parents but isnt it more important that you want to stay in a relationship because YOU want to and NOT because your parents want you to. Does this not take away from your own happiness?
Re: After you said "YES"
^Then she realized that she "woke" up as a bhatakti hui aathma.
Re: After you said “YES”
^ 
Yup and I decided to haunt GS to look for my pati dev but alas this place is full of jinns! runs
Re: After you said "YES"
^Oh noble aatma...........please list the name of the guppy-jinns so that everyone who is human (male and female) can be on their guard.
Re: After you said "YES"
Hmm that's kinda sweet that you have so much faith and love for your parents but isnt it more important that you want to stay in a relationship because YOU want to and NOT because your parents want you to. Does this not take away from your own happiness?
Yup but honestly my parents happiness matters more than my own happiness. at this stage i just cant go and say that i am not happy with this rishta...it will be wrong since my parents said yes after asking me but us waqt maine jald baazi main haan bol diya....abhi agar shor machaoon ya inkaar karoon tou mere parents ki be-izzati hogi aur shayad saari umar mere parents mere se naraaz rahain ge and I dont want that on any cost....they have done soooo much and i am not going to upset them on anycost.
Re: After you said "YES"
I got married and i am still married and my parents still get flustered alot................either i am palacting my parents or my husband. We move alot because of my husbands job and that really gets on the nerves of my parents.
Parents shouldnt be possessive. Being the only child is such a curse sometimes.
Re: After you said "YES"
Yup but honestly my parents happiness matters more than my own happiness. at this stage i just cant go and say that i am not happy with this rishta...it will be wrong since my parents said yes after asking me but us waqt maine jald baazi main haan bol diya....abhi agar shor machaoon ya inkaar karoon tou mere parents ki be-izzati hogi aur shayad saari umar mere parents mere se naraaz rahain ge and I dont want that on any cost....they have done soooo much and i am not going to upset them on anycost.
After 3 or 4 years you will look back and think how stupid these thoughts were, You will be Happily married InshAllah.
Re: After you said “YES”
I wonder what would happen if I did that 
Then again, I have cold feet all the time.
Re: After you said "YES"
After I said "yes", I realised I had made the biggest mistake of my life. Suicidal, I jumped off of a clif and then I woke up! :o
shuker hai, USSSS ki jaan bach gaee :)
Re: After you said "YES"
After 3 or 4 years you will look back and think how stupid these thoughts were, You will be Happily married InshAllah.
i wont go in details but lets see. thanks
inshallah