Re: Advice on how to deal with my father
Hm, I haven’t read that thread, haven’t been in this section of GS in a while. And I’m not trying to make her seem helpless, she herself wrote:
*We live on egg shells and we are not allowed to go out, visit anybody, and keep any relations with our family. His view of Islam is that a woman’s work is in the household and he has a right to talk in a bad manner with her. He also has a failed marriage before him with 5 kids as well. I assume the reasons are the same. He has no empathy and restricts everything. Even how spoons are kept in the kitchen must be how he wants, how a dish is washed must be his way. What we wear must be his way – he himself never follows his rules. The list and events can go on and on. *
These are her own words, not mine.
Either way, internet definitely helps to find information to leave home. I remember the first time I had internet acces in my home was in 2000. That helped me get information and access to leave home with my children and go to a safe house. OP can do the same; coffeegirl, see where you can find help in your area. I see your location is U.K. They definitely have arrangements for people in your situation. In the Netherlands, there are even special safe houses for Islamic females, perhaps you have them in the U.K. as well. Ask your Mum if she’d be willing to live in one of those for a while. No males are allowed in either kind of safe house, sometimes you have one or two work there, such as a plumber perhaps. Other than that, it’s all females and children. It gives time to relax, to deal with issues, to find your own home, perhaps an education, and a job.
By the way, in case any male is in trouble and reading this, there are safe houses for males in similar situations too. Well, we have them here in the Netherlands anyway and I read somewhere they are creating more in different places.