Re: Advice Needed on How To Handle Argument
Be patient and try harder to only rely on yourself. I know its tough but the more self-reliant you become...the less power you will give to others to hurt you. The less problems you will have. The less issues you will face with in-laws. Stop asking them to step in, stop asking them for anything, keep to yourself and keep your kids to yourself. Apnay kaam se kaam rakho.
Re: Advice Needed on How To Handle Argument
Off topic but how were you soothing your baby when he had that colic episode that you are referring to which woke up the whole house?
Re: Advice Needed on How To Handle Argument
Off topic but how were you soothing your baby when he had that colic episode that you are referring to which woke up the whole house?
Gave him gripe water, I patted his back, put him over my knee and patted his back and massaged his tummy. He only settled after he had a poop. All the wind came out like that I guess.
Re: Advice Needed on How To Handle Argument
Thank you to everyone for the advice. I will definitely try to heed it. I can't go and stay with my parents as they live about 5 hours away and it would be difficult to travel with my children right now.
I am trying to be more proactive, keeping on top of housework and managing okay for now I think.
I'm not sure that going out for a coffee or ice cream or a walk with husband is an option right now. He comes home late from work, he's really busy right now, and he's not really talking much to me anyways. We don't even have small chit chat. Just one word answers and short questions like "Is the water hot?" "Any towels?" Etc. I don't really know what to say to him actually. Suggesting some time alone might not go down well. He already said he doesn't want any of that lovey dovey stuff. I think that might come under that definition for him. I think I'm just going to focus on the kids and house right now.
I just seem to annoy him. Maybe its best just to stay out of his way, I don't know.
Re: Advice Needed on How To Handle Argument
Thank you to everyone for the advice. I will definitely try to heed it. I can't go and stay with my parents as they live about 5 hours away and it would be difficult to travel with my children right now. I am trying to be more proactive, keeping on top of housework and managing okay for now I think. I'm not sure that going out for a coffee or ice cream or a walk with husband is an option right now. He comes home late from work, he's really busy right now, and he's not really talking much to me anyways. We don't even have small chit chat. Just one word answers and short questions like "Is the water hot?" "Any towels?" Etc. I don't really know what to say to him actually. Suggesting some time alone might not go down well. He already said he doesn't want any of that lovey dovey stuff. I think that might come under that definition for him. I think I'm just going to focus on the kids and house right now. I just seem to annoy him. Maybe its best just to stay out of his way, I don't know.
Focus on your kids and getting your life in order...husband isn't going anywhere. Let him come to you and until he does...just go about your business and leave him alone. Don't be hostile but don't ask for anymore attention or favors from him or his family.
Just logged in on a whim. And re-read all these posts. It's strange how it's all familiar even though it was 3 years ago now. My kids are growing up mashallah. 3 year old is in nursery part time and my 4 year old starts school in two weeks. I'm glad we got through these last three years. My SILs also got married and moved out so now it's just me and my husband and his mum and dad and our kids in this house. Nothing else has changed though except for the fact that his parents don't talk to me at all anymore and neither does he. I keep busy with housework and the kids and in a few months I'll be starting a part time job while the kids are in school/nursery. I'm looking forward to that. I don't think some things are fixable. You can try your best and keep trying but in the end sometimes you just need to accept that it doesn't work. Another 20 years and the kids will be grown and maybe married themselves and then I'll probably be free to live my own life.
Its weird looking back at yourself. I was so stupid 3 years ago.
Hope everyone else is well.
That doesn’t sound normal. You can always get a divorce. Why stay married to someone who doesn’t talk to you? 20 years is a longass time.
With this mind set you will not be living your own life even in 20 years.