Advice for newlyweds???

[nnabid]

Re: Advice for newlyweds???

@HiraIM

I was at the drs once, and an elderly lady (must have been in her 80s) said to me (after finding out i recently got married) , “beta, do everything for your husband…beybass kardo usko..that he can’t do anything without you…” she further went on to say that she used to do everything for her husband, so much ..that within a year.. he was totally dependent on her - wouldn’t even think about taking any big steps without her advice/input. since that day - her advice has stuck with me.

With the whole inlaws, and family situation - stay quiet. best policy. I wish i had known about it earlier… don’t interfere with “their family matters” , just keep quiet and observe. if your hubby asks for your input - ONLY GIVE IT TO HIM and not so bluntly.. be gentle about it.

Also remember, you are not their “Daughter” - as much as they will say you are - there will ALWAYS BE A DIFFERENCE. don’t fight infront of them with your husband and don’t back talk to your husband infront of them. at that point, even if hubby is wrong..tell him hes right and talk about it in the privacy of your own bedroom.

Really good advice. I’ve heard all of this before in different forms and from different people but I just need to drill it into my head and practice it I think.

Question re the family: how do you handle if your in laws have demands/expectations of YOU? You can’t stay quiet and ignore in that situation, can you? What if those expectations are the opposite of what you normally do? Do you tell them it’s not what you’re used to, or do you do things to make them happy, even at your own expense?