Re: Adoption
Would rather let kids live in the gutter than let them adopted by responsible parents?
Vice President Dick Cheney has an adopted girl from Bangladesh.
Re: Adoption
sadly that is the case. Pakistan has a requirement that one must be muslim and atleats one person in teh couple must be Pakistani to adopt. Now if ppl were beating down the doors and adopting then I could somewhat say that was okay…but that is not the case. aside from newborns which have a waiting list..per the reasons I xplained earlier, older kids have no takers for the most part.
bangladesh allowed non muslims to adopt after 1971 to place the kids that no one wanted there because they were a result of rapes during the war. That was a temporary relieve on adoption, and from what was told by the Bnagladeshi ambassador, the adoption laws now are similar to Pakistan
Re: Adoption
i think that only couples with his moral values could adopt someone , i've tremendous respect for such kind fellows , haven't thought about this option ever but the idea of , what if ????????? i won't have courage to justify equally among adopted kid/ kids & biological kid/ kids , shakes my nerves.
Re: Adoption
sahi ja rhay ho.
As for adoption, I think more people should come forward and share their stories. It helps overcome the so called shame that is associated with it. Fraudz, ur story is an inspiration for a lot of us. Feel free to be outspoken about it.
btw, what is the verdict on helping an orphanage run by non-muslims?
Re: Adoption
the answer is simple, is there a limit to who can benefit from sadqa? I guess some may argue that you are supporting an institution that is raising kids to be non muslims and all, but to me atleast that should not be a hinderance. IN the end we are all God's creation and our obligations to meet haqooq al ibaad dont stop at muslims.
Re: Adoption
Fayz..
The sad thing is that our culture is vicious and ugly. I use an email address for only members of this site to contact me.
after I posted about adopting the babies I got mocking emails from cowards who could not even use their real names to state that, and the emails ranged anywhere from laughing that my thingie does not work, and I shoot blanks to I am not a real man to have a child, to I am not a real man to get a second wife if my wife cant have children, to telling me that my kids came from a gutter and to be prepared because they will show their 'khaslat' as they grow up.
That is the mindset of some people on this site. you can go ahead and think what that means for our society at large. These are people who have issues with me and my views. It was interesting to note that they chose to get so cheap and personal, and attack me, my wife, and my children in their thirst to score one against me..;. bravo..good job. and then they post about religion here..
I frankly dont blame people in Pakistan who dont want people to know that they have adopted. With this type of venom that people have not only for people who adopted but the innocent children... no wonder things are the way they are.
Re: Adoption
^ Oh my goodness...
how can someone be so horrible and disgusting to actually say that? Kitnay beghairat laug.. you should post the PMs and say who said it. someone who says something so terrible should not be spared
Re: Adoption
Sara I dont know who they were for sure, I could guess by writing styles, and it was really one or max two ppl writing from seperate email addresses. but who cares u know. I would be bothered if people close to me harboured such views, not some nameless faceless spineless keyboard jihadis on a bulletinboard :)
Re: Adoption
You got more guts than I do..
i wuda posted the PMs everywhere and let others deal with it :aq:
Re: Adoption
:no:…that’s really sad and sick of people to send those sort of hate mails:disgust:
Re: Adoption
anyways..lets not get carried away in this thread with my deaings with some idiots.
If you want to see how these orphans live, i had some pics in my journal that you can see. just..help em out you know, any country, any city, any orphanage, any way you can, whether it is time to go and be a mentor, or to sponsor one child, to adopt, or to just send them something good to eat and something good to wear..
every little bit counts. I saw teens there that had 2 sets of clothes, one they wore, other washed and teh cycle continued..their entire belongings in a 1foot by 3.5 feet locker. them sleeping on bunkbeds that were 3 or 4 levels high...and these were the kids who had it good.
Re: Adoption
Unbelievable. People have so much venom when it comes to other people's business. Ignore them man! I'm sure these two-faced basterds think their prayers are 'counted'
Re: Adoption
anyways, guys there is a Dr here on our site who is going to Pakistan to do some work for the orphans. I suggest we become her support group and when she is there and set up she can tell us how we can help. I will hope that she looks at this thread and introduces herself.
It is tough because today if you want to do something, u dont know what to do, who to call, except edhi foundation and even then you dont knwo what they need and all. but you know..taking that first step helps.
Fayz: thanks, I am just kinda moving beyond that rant of mine cuz I dont want that to derail the discussion :)
Re: Adoption
That's right. Most people don't know where to start. There is no transparency and visibility to what happens to all the charity that is sent to Pakistan. A lot of people (including guppies) stepped forward to help the earthquake victims but god knows if the charity ever made it to the victims.
I encourage the doctor to come forward and let us know if we could be of any help.
Re: Adoption
and I doubt that someone adopts a kid and says ...oh she looks fine, or he looks fine and starts fantasizing about them. we don't do this is our culture but american people are like that.
That is the most idiotic, racist, and ignorant statement I have ever read on this site, and believe me, I've seen quite a bit here.
What do you know about Americans or adoption in general?
I was adopted, and I believe that it is one of the greatest gifts you can give a child. My parents loved my brother, sister, and I, and gave us a stable home. I grew up in a loving extended family and was truly blessed through adoption. Couples are screened very carefully in the US, and abuse of an adopted child is probably much rarer than other types of abuse, because of the screening process.
My husband and I would love to adopt a child from a muslim country, although we already have a large family, but we know how his family would treat the child, and it wouldn't be fair to bring a child into that situation.
Re: Adoption
amana, the screening process is very detailed.
u get character reports from people not related to you who have known you long term.
you get local police records, state records, FBI records, you get finger printed, you go through detailed homestudies, you get health tests done..drugs, stds etc etc are screened for. You provide a complete history of yourself snd they can contact anyone who has been in contact with you..work, school, neighbours.. u name it.
do some bad apples get thru..probably so, but the system is pretty thorough.
Re: Adoption
The sad thing is that our culture is vicious and ugly. I use an email address for only members of this site to contact me.
after I posted about adopting the babies I got mocking emails from cowards who could not even use their real names to state that, and the emails ranged anywhere from laughing that my thingie does not work, and I shoot blanks to I am not a real man to have a child, to I am not a real man to get a second wife if my wife cant have children, to telling me that my kids came from a gutter and to be prepared because they will show their 'khaslat' as they grow up.
That is the mindset of some people on this site. you can go ahead and think what that means for our society at large. These are people who have issues with me and my views. It was interesting to note that they chose to get so cheap and personal, and attack me, my wife, and my children in their thirst to score one against me..;. bravo..good job. and then they post about religion here..
I frankly dont blame people in Pakistan who dont want people to know that they have adopted. With this type of venom that people have not only for people who adopted but the innocent children... no wonder things are the way they are.
I cant believe people do that ...then again..I do.. .Literally parhe likhe unparh!!...I am seeing some of the live things people try to do to try to discourage a couple from adopting...its pretty pathetic
Re: Adoption
was looking for orphanage info in pakistan and saw this. dont think there are any pics of edhi or kahsna e itfal or SOS villages online.
Re: Adoption
sos villages in pakistan
Re: Adoption
The sad thing is that our culture is vicious and ugly. I use an email address for only members of this site to contact me.
after I posted about adopting the babies I got mocking emails from cowards who could not even use their real names to state that, and the emails ranged anywhere from laughing that my thingie does not work, and I shoot blanks to I am not a real man to have a child, to I am not a real man to get a second wife if my wife cant have children, to telling me that my kids came from a gutter and to be prepared because they will show their 'khaslat' as they grow up.
That is the mindset of some people on this site. you can go ahead and think what that means for our society at large. These are people who have issues with me and my views. It was interesting to note that they chose to get so cheap and personal, and attack me, my wife, and my children in their thirst to score one against me..;. bravo..good job. and then they post about religion here..
I frankly dont blame people in Pakistan who dont want people to know that they have adopted. With this type of venom that people have not only for people who adopted but the innocent children... no wonder things are the way they are.
What else could you expect form these jahil desis on this site. One or the other way they would show their real "AUQAAT". pathetic and shameless people.
It doesn't mater they are in west/east they have all the rigid mindset of desi culture in them.