Adopting a Child - A taboo?

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21

Re: Adopting a Child - A taboo?

Obviously. True altruism doesn't exist. People even have children for themselves.

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Re: Adopting a Child - A taboo?

I know and agree what you want to convey, but the situation is quite different when our own child got some problem. At that time, we won't start mentioning our limitations, but while adopting a special child (just for an example), people do behave like they are in super market to get best variety.

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Re: Adopting a Child - A taboo?

People are like that with their own children too many a times. Many get abortions if the doc tells beforehand about the child being born disabled. Many leave disabled kids at orphanages or in complete care of maids. The latter isn't hard to come by either.

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I know and agree what you want to convey, but the situation is quite different when our own child got some problem. At that time, we won't start mentioning our limitations, but while adopting a special child (just for an example), people do behave like they are in super market to get best variety.
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Although it is not much different from the decision to be parents have to make when they are told that an unborn is likely to have Down syndrome or major issues. Many pregnancies are terminated, yet again it's not shared how many were terminated vs public statement that there was a miscarriage.

A special needs child is not something that everyone can handle emotionally, financially, and not to mention be strong enough to face the way our society generally reacts.

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1- the inconsistency is when in families where parda is not observed among other NA mehrams this is called as an issue. But yes otherwise, it's a condition that has to be satisfied.

2- inheritance no, gift yes. But it was a two way street so ppl who were raising an orphan did not get access to the assets left for the child by his parents, additionally it will decrease opposition in the family for someone raising an orphaned child due to family members fearing for impact on their stake in the inheritance.

Similarly, in the example u have of 'aaq' ... A parent has full right to gift anything to anyone to a point that nothing is left for the kid they don't want anything for. It's all roundabout stuff but sadly the essence gets lost. Which is too broad to cover here.

I have shared it on this site before but someone in my sisters social circle had adopted a girl. The adoptive parents died in an accident, and the deceased mans brothers swiftly moved in to take the inheritance, since the property and assets were mostly in Pakistan, leaving her with nothing. Luckily one of the deceased friends was a human being and took the girl in his family.

Now technically if they are not observing purda, they are religiously more wrong than the brothers who took everything.

Makes sense to you?

Point is that the conditions exist for a reason, people need to understand

The people with a claim on inheritance due to their relationship do have the ability to give up their claim in the benefit of their brother or sisters or fathers adopted/fostered/whatever term child.

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Re: Adopting a Child - A taboo?

Most often Sinful mothers, throw away their najaiz newborns into garbage site which are then available for adoption in various centres. The sinful, unmarried love couples at least should learn things or two about contraception.

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Re: Adopting a Child - A taboo?

There is case in my extended family in which both parents died in accident, along with 12 other musafir. They left 5 kids, their uncle from father side took their responsibility, without adopting them. They were already living in the same house. Now they are quite grown up and call their uncle "abu chacha", i.e they see him as fatherly as well as uncle figure.