How did you to adjust to changes after marriage and how long did it take you? changes like e.g.
You have to cook yourself
you have to wake up early to give breakfast to husband or parents-in-law
you have to maintain the house i.e. laundry, dish washing etc
If you are changing the country, how did you adjust to the new place and how long did it take you
If you used to work before marriage, how did you adjust to the fact that you wouldnt be working after marriage if you were a career oriented sort of woman
There is some one you will have to take permission from
There is some one who has the right to say No to what you want some times
If you previously lived in pakistan, a large part of the work was done by maids, how did you adjust to the change that you will have to do everything yourself
You are the responsible person, now you cant leave things on your parents or siblings, you have to do them
How did you to adjust to changes after marriage and how long did it take you? changes like e.g.
You have to cook yourself
you have to wake up early to give breakfast to husband or parents-in-law
you have to maintain the house i.e. laundry, dish washing etc
If you are changing the country, how did you adjust to the new place and how long did it take you
If you used to work before marriage, how did you adjust to the fact that you wouldnt be working after marriage if you were a career oriented sort of woman
There is some one you will have to take permission from
There is some one who has the right to say No to what you want some times
If you previously lived in pakistan, a large part of the work was done by maids, how did you adjust to the change that you will have to do everything yourself
You are the responsible person, now you cant leave things on your parents or siblings, you have to do them
Daffy,
ur post sent me to the depressing state :S
i want to work/study after marriage
i dont wanna be the one on whome the inlwas imposes their orders
i want my freedom as it is now wen living with my folks
i want a social life, not being housewife treated like maids... :S
is there any way to scape........ ?
i think as far as changing the location is concerned, its a lot more easier if u are just moving with ur hubby, no matter one have to take the responsibility of home and household chores, but at least they are lucky living alone w/out in-laws
How did you to adjust to changes after marriage and how long did it take you? changes like e.g.
You have to cook yourself
you have to wake up early to give breakfast to husband or parents-in-law
you have to maintain the house i.e. laundry, dish washing etc
If you are changing the country, how did you adjust to the new place and how long did it take you
If you used to work before marriage, how did you adjust to the fact that you wouldnt be working after marriage if you were a career oriented sort of woman
There is some one you will have to take permission from
There is some one who has the right to say No to what you want some times
If you previously lived in pakistan, a large part of the work was done by maids, how did you adjust to the change that you will have to do everything yourself
You are the responsible person, now you cant leave things on your parents or siblings, you have to do them
Very well identified adjustments which are needed after marriage for girls. If we do not want to accept the need of these adjustments, we will only be making fools of ourselves. WARNING for all the unmarried girls out there.
I have been married for 7 months now Alhamdullilah but they have been a breeze. I had to study for my final year mbbs exams and fortunately my in laws have been very sweet and accomodating. I was allowed to move to my parents’ place for studying or come back at my own will. I didn’t need to do any chores or entertain guests as people knew I have to study
but now IA am moving to the UK with my hubby… and that’s where the real shadi shuda game would start
All the adjustments you mentioned above DaffyDuck are yet to come. Hopefully I would be able to give realtime updates of the adjustment phase of mine
I have been married for 4 weeks now. One week after the wedding my husband and I moved from Canada to the states (where we dont know anyone). But I think it took me about a week to adjust to everything that you mentioned. We literally had to start from scratch here, so we worked through alot of things together. Now all this stuff is easy for me, and Im used to it. I think what may have helped me is that all my life I have seen my mom doing all this stuff, so for me it was just natural to take up that role. but sometimes when I look back at my life pre-marriage, it was really easy and simple, I didnt have to do any house work, I worked, I went out when I wanted, I spent my money anyway I wanted, and now all of a sudden its so different, so that seems weird to me.
How did you to adjust to changes after marriage and how long did it take you? changes like e.g.
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You have to cook yourself
Had to cook for myself before marriage as well. its just as easy to cook for two as it is for one and nice to have company for meals. :)
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you have to wake up early to give breakfast to husband or parents-in-law
**don't have to wake up early!. Part of living together with someone is that you adjust to each others schedules.
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- you have to maintain the house i.e. laundry, dish washing etc
Did that before getting married as well! ... don't most people (whether they live at home or away)?? At least now I have someone who can lend me a hand.
- If you are changing the country, how did you adjust to the new place and how long did it take you
Didn't have to go through that one. Thank god.
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- If you used to work before marriage, how did you adjust to the fact that you wouldnt be working after marriage if you were a career oriented sort of woman
I've continued my career post-marriage as well. Its a topic we had discussed before Nikkah and came to a mutual understanding.
- There is some one you will have to take permission from
ehhh? don't know what you mean. Your husband is your partner not your father. I haven't had to get "permission" for anything so far .... however, as I now have a second person in my life I do keep in mind how my actions/in-actions will affect their life.
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- There is some one who has the right to say No to what you want some times
**There is always that in life. Be it your boss, siblings, parents, friends, the bank, potential employers. Dealing with "No" is part of an adult life regardless of marital status.
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- If you previously lived in Pakistan, a large part of the work was done by maids, how did you adjust to the change that you will have to do everything yourself
Didn't and still dont live in pk.
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- You are the responsible person, now you cant leave things on your parents or siblings, you have to do them
ehhhh?? ... if one was leaving "issues of responsibility" to parents/siblings before marriage ... it shows they weren't yet equipped to get married. signing off on the nikkah papers doesn't suddenly make one capable of amazing new feats .... certain things ... like "responsibility" needs to be acquired and demonstarted before taking on another person ... just my 2 cents.
Well, usally in the beginning, new brides tend to do every thing by the book, waking up early and cooking heavy breakfasts. After a while people do get more relaxed. Yes, housework is more as compared to Pakistan but then dust is lesser and things don't get as dirty as they do in Pakistan. Also, modern gadgets like Vaccum cleaners and dishwashers make this easier (I know you have these in Pakistan too, but not luxry of having to operate them any time you want due to electricity issues). I wanted to quit working after marriage so yaay for me. Ifyou want to work maybe later your husband will see eye to eye with you, that happens often. Permission??? Well, if your husband turns out to be the "permission " sort of guy remember you also asked permission from your parents before marriage. In today's world though most men are partners in this respect and you "discuss" rather than ask permission.
New country! I loved the aminiteis of USA compared to Pakistan so it was fun for me.
Also,if you used to work before marriage then you already are used to responsiblity, it shouldn't be hard for you!!
How did you to adjust to changes after marriage and how long did it take you? changes like e.g.
You have to cook yourself
you have to wake up early to give breakfast to husband or parents-in-law
you have to maintain the house i.e. laundry, dish washing etc
If you are changing the country, how did you adjust to the new place and how long did it take you
If you used to work before marriage, how did you adjust to the fact that you wouldnt be working after marriage if you were a career oriented sort of woman
There is some one you will have to take permission from
There is some one who has the right to say No to what you want some times
If you previously lived in pakistan, a large part of the work was done by maids, how did you adjust to the change that you will have to do everything yourself
You are the responsible person, now you cant leave things on your parents or siblings, you have to do them
