I met a lady few days back (I work at a women shelter) who told me her story. It goes like this;
She and her husband are afghan and got asylum here a few years back. She told me her husband was abusive in all ways; physically, mentally, you name it. And now, that she is pregnant, he wants to divorce her. She somehow, is okay with that, as she never was happy with the marriage because of the beating and all.
She is veeery young (got married at a very young age), and well, she wants so take an abortion now. The husband has made it clear that he wants nothing to do with the child or her. She is in a dilemma where she knows it is gunnah, but at the same time she is seeing an opportunity to start from the scratch where she can get an education, work etc. She is asking me for advice, and I’ve just been telling her to follow her heart.
I’ve told her the islamic aspect on this, and that she cannot get divorced until she has had the baby etc.
What would you do in such a situation? Abortion or not?
And no, she has no family/relatives here. She’s alone.
Re: Abortion and divorce - what advice do you have?
Where are you getting the 40 day limit from…a medical perspective or an Islamic one? If it’s the latter…from what I’ve read, the limit is 120 days because by then the soul has already been blown into the child. For women who are in very, very pressing circumstances and have legit reasons for an abortion…the 40 day limit would be a very, very tight window…esp since some women may not even know they’re pregnant until after 40 days have passed.
OP…let’s say that your friend gives up the baby for adoption. Then sometime in the future she gets married again and feels ready to start a family. When the feelings of motherhood/maternal instincts kick in…she may even feel guilty for giving up her first child. This is something she needs to think about.
I think it was 40 days from the Islamic perspective, but might be wrong. It’s not a limit, it’s just the time after which soul enters the fetus and it turned into a human
Re: Abortion and divorce - what advice do you have?
My personal opinion is she should have the baby as it is a test from Allah, and who knows He might place Blessings in that child for her. I certainly don’t think she should abort if she is worried about financial support, as Allah has made it clear that He will provide when a child is born. The only time I see a reason for abortion is if the pregnancy causes risk to the mother. If the mother is healthy (regardless of whether or not the child is healthy) she should have it and trust in Allah.
Re: Abortion and divorce - what advice do you have?
That doesn’t even make sense. So are you saying if God forbid the scans are showing a deformed/terminally sick baby, u should go ahead with the pregnancy?
Re: Abortion and divorce - what advice do you have?
I searched and there is a ruling for iddah period with divorce while pregnant. The girl’s iddah will complete when she has delivered the baby.
The divorce is valid while pregnant.
