aakhir kyun?

Lifestyle Relationships
1

whats the magic in this “so called love” jis kay peechay insaan lerka ya lerki upnay maa baap behan bhai sab bhool jatay haen

kya love jaisi koi shay exist kerti hai, jo insaan ko itna andhaa ker dayti hai kay wo bagaawat per utar ata hai

Phir, jub shaadi hoti hai to kai logoun ko baad mein regret kyun hota hai. Pehlay kya wo us lerkay ya lerki ko nahi jaantay thay?

2

Re: aakhir kyun?

Love is very different than teenage stupidity. The person you love is the person you wish to spend the rest of life with. It is your life in the end regardless of what your parents say. The idea should be to ensure that everybody gets along and you do love the person. That is the ideal.

But there is a time when a man has to be a man and decide that if the woman he cares for is worth his entire future. If she is then well time to be a man and inform the parents whats what.

3

Re: aakhir kyun?

Dil tou bacha hai jee:P

pyar jab hota hai na tab "Maa,Baap,Behan,Bhai "or zamedariya nahee hoti..

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Re: aakhir kyun?

kyun nahi hoti..... kahan likha hai ye

yehi to sara masla hai i have seen a girl struggling till the end and got married to this guy jis ko wo saari dunya say zayada pyar kerti thi, per ab after 2 months of their marriage they got separated...

by the way they knew each other, ya ye kahoun aik duusray say pyar kertay thay peechlay 4 saal say......

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Re: aakhir kyun?

:konfused:

6

Pyar etc, Baap , dada key kamayee per hi hota hay, i haven't seen people working hard gets in filmy kind of love...

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Re: aakhir kyun?

8

Agreed.....tou tum bata sakti ho inn ki kis wajah se separation hoi?

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Re: aakhir kyun?

well point to be noted is that, log kehtay haen kay similarities couples mein houn to zayada acha hota hai, if u ask me itna acha bhi nahi hota hai

ab unki seperation is liye hui kay wo aik duusray ko zaroorat say zayada jaannay lagay thay!!!

:hmmm:

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Re: aakhir kyun?

You can't say that the whole concept of education is shi'te because you know some people who didn't do well (or failed) in school. I would think that the majority of couples love each other, sacrifice for each other and so forth. I have seen quite a few examples of love marriages that turned out great, some went against the families. There is absolutely nothing wrong with loving someone dearly and struggling to be with them.

The only problem is when people confuse love with infatuation and teenage bollywood madness.

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Re: aakhir kyun?

This is why I am against love marriages. In most cases, this love before the marriage is nothing but infatuation. Shadi ke baad sari infatuation khatam. This love usually is based on lust and desires, physical attraction or simply attraction. Urdu main ise kehte hain sirf ishq junoon aur dewangi, muhabbat nahi.
To me sachi muhabbat wo hai jisme aik doosre ka be-inteha khayal hota hai chahe doosra kaisa/kaisi bhi ho. Aur sachi muhabbat kisi ki soorat se nahi howa karti, uski seerat se hoti hai. Aur I think it is a fact ke sirf pure arrange marriages mai hi banda/bandi doosre ki soorat se ziada uski seerat ko observe kar ke pasand karta hai. Usay pata hota hai ke ye ab meri/mera life partner hai, aur (agar) mai aik samajh daar aur acha/achi insaan hun, to mai isay apnane ki poori koshish karonga/karongi khud acha shohar/biwi bankay aur us mai achaei chahe jitni bhi ho doodnh ke. Eventaully aise couples mai bepanah physical attraction bhi paida ho jaati hai.

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Re: aakhir kyun?

to LOVE and to be LOVED is wonderful if you find that PERFECT person, but you should never forget that the person you love may leave/divorce you but ur parents never will

Your love is conditional but theirs is unconditional

So on a balanced view point having loved and lost...no person is worth more than ur PARENTS in this world

13

To be honest it doesn't make any sense.

Where did you pull 'in most cases' out of? Have you conducted a survey or something?

How do you observe someone's seerat in the desi arranged marriage chai parade? Don't you think if you actually know a person (again, chai parade for getting to know a person doesn't count) there is a better chance of being attracted to them both physically and based on personality?

PS: Reading and understanding roman urdu is a B.

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Re: aakhir kyun?

@ janwar

i dont want to start this discussion here, but i m sure even u wud know of cases where the guy and girl liked each other before marraige, so they got married, and what happened after? "my husband has temper problems, i dont see that love for me anymore, he has changed" or "she doesn't dress the way i want her to (hijab stuff), or she is not a good person"
i used the word "most" because yes its true there are some successful love marriages and so yes there is a lot of chance that the "love" can be both physically and based on personality
you don't observe seerat in a desi "chai parade"...if u read my post i talked about tht for between a couple only

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Re: aakhir kyun?

^ You can't start this discussion anywhere because you don't make much sense. Marriage is risky business, one could end up in a bad situation - arranged or love marriage has nothing to do with it. In my opinion, if you know the person beforehand, the risk involved is lesser compared to jumping into an arranged marriage with a complete stranger. Success or failure of a marriage has less to do with it being love or arranged, and more to do with the nature of the people involved.

Ermm ok, so you meant that a couple can observe each other's seerat once they are married? And how is that helpful again?

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Re: aakhir kyun?

@ janwar

No wonder I don't make much sense to you becasue you are asking me how observing seerat between a couple will help while I gave a little lecture already in my first post how it helps - may be its the roman urdu that's not letting my post make much sense to you. Well what I a said was that in an arrange marriage case, since they are strangers to each other, a husband and wife are more willing to compromise and usually are happy becasue they learn to like each other by who they are - ie. their personality or seerat - than just looks. Ofcourse looks matter at first impression, but if one's spouse is not very appealing of look, there are more chances of compromise in an arrange marriage than love marriage.
I do agree there that marriage is a gamble and that some arrange marriages do turn out to be bad and yes there is lesser risk in knowing the other half from before, but its more unfortunate to end up in a bad marriage by choice.

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Re: aakhir kyun?

Love comes with patience and unfortunately no one is this patient these days .

18

only in arranged marriages you cant find out the seerat factor.....it's always the outer layer thats been examined during typical rishta process..you just jump into a well where you have no idea whether you will find the water or not...

but either way...marriage is unpredictable and you have to make it work whether its arranged by parents or with the consent of two people in love....

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Re: aakhir kyun?

actually before marriage when some one is in love they lives in dreams but after marriage there is no dream they have to face reality i think thats why they r going toward sepration

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Re: aakhir kyun?

yeh sab batein jo umarreid larkiya phuchti hain yeh sab batein unhe shadi k baad pata chalti hain

if think that they dotn exsist then wait till u get married

trust me i had the same feeling...