**http://65.175.69.168:91/dblog/2009/05/21/a-society-misunderstood/
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Posted by Guest in Pakistan on 05 21st, 2009 | 2 responses
Farzana Shah writes about misconceptions and false assumptions about life in Peshawar.
I really feel very bad when the whole world reduces us to a place only inhabited by bearded men and buraq-clad women. True, they exist- but others do too.
Things can get terrible and fear can take over us but people forget that there is a resilient side to us too. Let me tell you an interesting story. There is a woman I know who works in my colony as a maid. She has about five kids and her son and daughter are married. She is very fond of Indian movies and every so often she goes to the cinema. Although she makes sure she covers her face when she goes, she would never sit home scared at the cost of missing her movies!
Now, in Peshawar, when girls go out with boys to cinemas, the Taliban is not what scares them. The bigger risk always is that the girl’s family might find out that she was out with a boy, which is why most of the time this woman is accompanied by another woman who is older but shares her passion of Indian movies.
Many years ago, when there was an official ban in the country on Indian movies, here in Peshawar, the cinemas used to quietly screen Indian movies while cleverly displaying posters and billboards of Pakistani movies outside the cinema on billboards and the lobbies. Everyone knew, even the officials.
For me things were different in those days more than they are now. People on the street used to become uncomfortable seeing a woman in short-sleeves or uncovered. Now, men do stare, but that’s something common throughout the country. For me personally, the most uncomfortable thing is that the bearded men with their tasbihs are the ones who stare at women here the most.
There are three bazaars in Peshawar, of which two are exclusively for women called Meena bazaar and Shaheen bazaar. In Saddar, which is for both men and women, a female is still given her due respect and despite all this militancy we know that if someone tried to touch us and if we started shouting, there’ll be many men coming forward to help us within seconds.
We also have women who wear burqas and observe purdah and that works fine too. I have friends who moved to Karachi. While here they used to be in burqas but in Karachi, they follow a different dress code and their families are fine with that. Interestingly, when they come to Peshawar they are back to their chaddars. Even those women who wear burqas and preach about adopting a more conservative dress, often have henna on their hands, pearls on their burqas and liner on their eyes….
I personally believe that it’s all about feeling sure about yourself. If you do, it makes a huge difference even in places with a war like situation.
**2 Comments »](http://65.175.69.168:91/dblog/2009/05/21/a-society-misunderstood/#postcomment) **
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Dalbir Singh says:
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I second the opinion of the writer. One of the residents I met was from Peshawar during their visit to Punjab ( East )in Sept, 2008 . I asked him how life was in Peshawar under the shadow of guns , he surprised me by saying that ” U have a wrong perception of Peshawar . It is actually very-very liberal deep inside , people r all same as here in Ludhiana ( East Punjab ) . And also it is one of the beautiful cities of Pakistan . ” Reading this blog reminds me of his words .
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Temur says:
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i don’t know why our country Pakistan has more bearded men and burqa clad women than indonesia and malaysia ? Jakarta got asia’s biggest disco and bars and clubs are everywhere. people are less bothered about who drinks alcohol and who go clubs. Why in Pakistan these ‘Samaaj ke Thekedaars’ specially these dariwalas are so concern or about who do what.
But believe me, there are more beard grown men increasing. I see many TV camera men reporting from street of Karachi or Islamabad or Lahore.. in background 8 out of 10 men are bearded.. whats wrong with our country ??? when you talk any of the person in Pakistan.. they start with alhamdolillah, mashallah, subhanallah and all sorts of religious words.. but most of them have evil inside. They harrass the women with their eyes.
Anyways.. God Bless Pakistan.
