Re: A simple girl?
Waterfall,
I agree with Sara516. When I read the story, I was surprised at how your mom's friend behaved. It's so rude of your mom's friend to say "well they weren't interested either". It would have been more tactful, in my opinion, for her to stay quiet.
Believe it or not but some parents are against their daughters going for a Master's Degree because they don't want her to appear too "modern" "forward" as they fear that will hinder her rishta chances. Pathetic, I know. I know your parents aren't like that that. But there are some tunnel-visioned folks out there.
One of my cousins in Pak is now happily married, MashaAllah. But she had receieved rishtas where the guy's family rejected her for having a job at a bank as they thought she was too "forward". I know of this one woman who had her son marry this girl simply because she was beautiful. At the time of the rishta, the guy and his family was fully aware that this girl was poor and not very educated but they agreed to the match anyways. And afterwards, they gave that girl a hard time and kept insulting her. The girl may have been poor and uneducated, but she was one brave woman. She gave the guy a divorce...........after she secretly got into contact with his FIRST WIFE.....and found out that the guy and his family treated the first wife like crap as well.
It's double standards. Some desi mom's look for qualities in their daughter-in-laws that their **OWN DAUGHTERS **don't possess. It's sad. But you should be grateful that you rejected that pathetic woman and her rishta. Could you imagine what would have happened if this rishta went through. Your sister deserves better and InshaAllah she'll find an amazing guy soon.
Every Muslim woman has the right to an education. And with the fragile economy we have today, it's a good idea for both spouses to have a degree.........in case the wife might have to work as well to support the family. You never know what can happen in the future. And it's very smart and practical for women to be educated and have a degree.....as a means of supporting themselves in the future.
I agree with you that this woman's idea of a "simple girl" is a girl that she can easily control. And it's sad how insecure she is. It's bad enough that she doesn't even know how to display proper manners as a guest in someone's home. I hope the "simple" girl she gets will be strong enough to knock some sense into her. As for her son.....if I were him, I'd feel embarrassed to have such a closed-minded mom who can't even behave properly as a guest.