(XXXXXXXX), i just wanted to tell you what i feel for you. I feel alone with out you. At times my heart feels as if its being pulled apart by strings and it wants to be there in (XXXXXXX). I keep forgetting that i am not in (XXXXXX) and the realization that you are not really around is a relevation everytime. It hurts a little…everytime. There is something that i am fighting within me. A part of me wants to purge you. It says stop it. So at times its a roller coaster ride. One which pushes, turns and twists my spirit around. I feel an extreme longing one moment and the second moment my nemesis closes those doors within my heart which bring forth the sunshine and warmth. I feel better within this silent , cold, darkness… till something once again stirs my emotions and kicks open these doors. The flood of emotional energy which follows gushes in as if its being propelled by all the oceans in the world. During this flow, this high… this height, i want to conquer the whole world. I feel limitless. I feel free. I feel divine. I feel you. I miss you. I long for you. I love you. However, the flame doesnt last that long and gives way to smoke and the creeping darkness.
i come to my senses … i feel dead again.
