I know your going through difficult time, may Allah give you peace and its really hard to relate to other ppl’s story, but after going thru ur recent thread I wanna tell u a real life story,
This is a story of my best friend since childhood, we went to same school, same college, same medical school, so I know every detail of her life.
She was friend with some paroosi guy for 8 years, they started as friend and ends as lovers, they talked to each other daily, for hours, used to meet each other every other day, kind of grew with each other, both were very sensible ppl. my friend was becoming a doc and that guy was doing accountancy. They never realized they liked each other the other way, they used to say they will help each other find right person b/c they knew each other so well.
Finally when girl rishta started coming and her parents were seriously considering , guy realize that he loves her and she loves him 2, but his mother never agrees for the girl , guy put every effort but cant make her mother agree. Guy went to girls parents and asked for rishta himself, the girl say no, I dont want to get bad duas from a mother, finally girl had her nikah but was waiting rukhsati b/c of our finals, the guy try to commit sucide, he survives but he wanted the girl to get khulaa, but the girl says no. Now after 5 years both of them are married not with each other, have kids, atill in touch wid a hi hello, do still miss each other but very happy in thier lives.
I know its lengthy and boring but I really wanted to share this amazing story with all of you and especially Amir.
you know no matter how hard it is- a person does move on.
But Amir is in a sitaution where hes left clueless- he has so many thoughts running thru his mind- wat did he do- wat did he say etc etc- the girl just walks out and never said anything.
That happened to my friend- she was with her guy for 4 yrs and they talked abt marriage etc etc one day the guy just walked out of her life- he moved from his apartment, changed his number, emails- u name it everything- my friend bechari- skipped school everyday to drive around and see if she can mayb bump into him somewhere and just ask him WHY-
she never met him- its been almost 2 yrs- she put that story behind her- but she did major damage to herself by smoking and drinking. Other than that she's moved on and with somebody but her smoking and drinking habits are due to him. I tried to help her to get out of it but shes too psycho- she will not. Allah behter karey
All in all- its best to get advice from Allah- SWT- everything happens for a reason- and if their not meant to be then nothing in this universe can MAKE things happen. Its all up to god- pray for your sins ask for help, and strenght and allah swt will guide you to the right path. Along with that keep urself busy in daily activities. Inshallah all will be fine.
What i don't understand is how can people who were soo in love and this guy is running after you, and you know that you love him, then why hold back? Why do people make things so hard? And the other thing is how can you EVER be happy with someone else, when as you said they still miss each other? Maybe i think wayy too much with my heart, WAIT NO, if you only think from your heart your stupid. But when they didn't marry each other they didn't use their heart or their brain! And don't get me wrong if they wanted to move on then okay cool, but you said they still miss eachother? I mean how can you sleep with a different person??? while you still miss someone else? Its makes me soo sad!
That is a really touching story dude. Its sad that they never got to be with each other. Maybe Allah destined them to be with someone else.. it was their kismat. It was written I guess in a way. I wonder why the girl kept saying no... I guess there maybe other reasons such as the guy is still studying, not matured enough, no financial gain nor power? Alot of these things are taken into account in today's society arranged marriages but then who knows..
What issue did the guy's mom have with the girl? Why did she not approve of her? I know that sometimes parents have VALID reasons for disapproving of a potential match. BUT OTHER TIMES...........I feel that PRIDE gets in the way of some parents. In other words they get upset that their child had a relationship behind their back........and some parents simply reject the person because they want their child to marry ONLY THEIR PREFERENCE, or because they feel insecure/jealous about the person their child likes. And that's not right or fair.
True say red! It depends on our parents mentality really. Some families are a big no no on having relationships whereas some are quite modern and have often said their children if you do have anyone in mind do tell us because afterall it is your life after all... you have to spend the rest of your life with her not us!!
You know the saying.. our parents are always the ones that will look out for us. Maybe they have heard rumours about that guy. Word travels fast in our culture. If one aunty hears a little bit of gossip.. by dinner time all your family knows.. its that catchy! lol Thing is our parents have seen it, been there and got the souvernir.. maybe they feel that they know it isnt going to work out so they advice/guide their children for a better option/suitor.
@ zero seriously planning to write a book on my friends story,whenever I got time from medicine,
@red velevt he was the only son and he had 2 sis, mom was way 2 possesive and also both their parents know that they were friends from the very begining , they never hide a thing from their parents, boy's mom never approved of the girl even when they were just friends. Its like larkay ko phansaalia n stuff.
@Gia: I am sorry but u never understand what I meant by miss each other,
why ppl consider love to be physical attraction. They really loved each other , I am witness of their love but in 8 years they never touched each other as lovers,just random holding hands stuff, but they spent so much time of their life together that they were almost on same page abt everything, they motivated each other in studies, everything, I have never seen a relationship like that, so positive.
@Mc Lovin: I told you the girl was really afraid of bad duaas, and the guy mother was contacting her to leave her son alone, and when after her nikah he commited sucide, the mother called girl a whore b/c of marrying someone else and making her son suffer. You dont know what the girl go through, she was not that strong but she stood strong for sake of the guy.
I know your going through difficult time, may Allah give you peace and its really hard to relate to other ppl's story, but after going thru ur recent thread I wanna tell u a real life story,
This is a story of my best friend since childhood, we went to same school, same college, same medical school, so I know every detail of her life.
She was friend with some paroosi guy for 8 years, they started as friend and ends as lovers, they talked to each other daily, for hours, used to meet each other every other day, kind of grew with each other, both were very sensible ppl. my friend was becoming a doc and that guy was doing accountancy. They never realized they liked each other the other way, they used to say they will help each other find right person b/c they knew each other so well.
Finally when girl rishta started coming and her parents were seriously considering , guy realize that he loves her and she loves him 2, but his mother never agrees for the girl , guy put every effort but cant make her mother agree. Guy went to girls parents and asked for rishta himself, the girl say no, I dont want to get bad duas from a mother, finally girl had her nikah but was waiting rukhsati b/c of our finals, the guy try to commit sucide, he survives but he wanted the girl to get khulaa, but the girl says no. Now after 5 years both of them are married not with each other, have kids, atill in touch wid a hi hello, do still miss each other but very happy in thier lives.
I know its lengthy and boring but I really wanted to share this amazing story with all of you and especially Amir.
"... and of the hearafter men are heedless..." -Quran
@red velevt he was the only son and he had 2 sis, mom was way 2 possesive and also both their parents know that they were friends from the very begining , they never hide a thing from their parents, boy's mom never approved of the girl even when they were just friends. Its like larkay ko phansaalia n stuff.
I've seen moms like this who only have one son and they don't even let DECENT and SIMPLE girls (I mean the kind of girls that are not flirtatious or chalaak) anywhere near their son. It's sad and disturbing. If the mom did not have any real valid reason for rejecting the girl and only based her rejection on her own insecurities, possessiveness, and jealousy.............then she deserves some of the blame.
@Gia: I am sorry but u never understand what I meant by miss each other,
why ppl consider love to be physical attraction. They really loved each other , I am witness of their love but in 8 years they never touched each other as lovers,just random holding hands stuff, but they spent so much time of their life together that they were almost on same page abt everything, they motivated each other in studies, everything, I have never seen a relationship like that, so positive.
Yes thats what i understood, but how can you even think of being with someone else after you know that you have connected with someone? But i'm happy that they are not sitting and crying about it, because that would just be soo sad! And who knows they might meet in heaven!