Assalaamoalaikum,
is it true dat in Islam women can’t visit the graveyard?? if yes, can people please tell me why, supportin it wid hadeeths, etc. pleaseeee, jazakallah!!!
Wasalam
The recommendation to visit graves is general and includes women, just as the earlier prohibition included them without any special mention. Furthermore, women share in the benefits of visiting the graves.
When the Prophet(SAW)found a woman crying in the graveyard, he did not chase her out of the graveyard, but told her not to cry. Anas ibn Maalik related that once the Prophet (SAW) passed by a woman crying beside a grave and said to her, "Fear Allah and be patient." [Sahih Al-Bukhari, vol.2, p.208, #372; Sahih Muslim, vol.2, p.439, #2013]
After mentioning this hadith under the heading Visiting Graves, Ibn Hajar said: The [scholars] disagreed regarding women [visiting graves]. The majority held that they are included in the general permission for visiting graves [if there is no danger of corruption]. The ruling permitting women to visit graves is supported by hadith. The source of evidence in the hadith is the fact that he(SAW) did not censure the woman for sitting beside the grave, and whatever he approves is proof [of it's permissibility]. [Fat-hul-Baaree, vol.4, p.244]
However, frequent visitation of graves by women is not permissable. Hassaan ibn Thaabit narrated that allah's Messenger (SAW) cursed women who frequently visit graves.
Perhaps the reason for not frequenting the graves is the possible negative results of such visits like:
The loss of some of their husband's rights due to their frequent absences from the home,
The unnecessary public exposure of women,
Increased depression leading to wailing and other forbidden expressions of grief.
The MAIN reason why FREQUENT visiting of graves is that it causes additional depression.
Plus, what people forget is that the discouragement of FREQUENTLY visiting graves is for both men and women -- remember, we are not to mourn excessively over the death of our loved ones.
Why? It causes
stress
possible depression
Also, when someone passes away, it is actually counterproductive for society to mourn excessively. What is gone is gone. The deceased are in God's hands now and the most one can do it pray for those souls. Shedding tears wont help that soul get into heaven, so why bother putting your body thru that stress?
I hope this answers the question.
However, if I'm not mistaken, in Pakistan, certain cities or areas don't allow their women to visit graves - however, this is again a result of male-dominated societal ideas being promoted in the name of Islam. You find a lot of that in Pakistan.
The question was not regarding “frequently” visiting, but any visit at all. I have heard scholars say that women should not go to graveyards because they are seen without any dress to the grave residents. I don’t know the basis of this, since I have read ahadith that Prophet Mohammed PBUH came across a weeping woman and he tried to stop her from crying but he didn’t ask her to leave grave yard, meaning he didn’t discourage of women in graveyard.
Graveyard visits are recommended to people, since it reminds them that one day he/she has to die too and hence should straighten him/herself up and prepare to meet The Creator (Allah SWT).
Yes, “frequent” visits may make one depressing and counter productive, so a “middle” way should work
However, there have been citings that woman who couldn’t bear a child would go to steps that are dangerous, they fall pray to spell casters/majicians who ask them to do certain things in graveyards and sometimes ask to dig fresh graves of a child/male/female and do certain things to/with it. That is ONE reason to discourage woman from visiting graveyards.
May Allah SWT guide us all towards right and help us follow the right
I do not know the exact ruling on this subject, but here's an excerpt from an article which used this as an example to explain the process of abrogation:
There is a well authenticated (hasan) hadith that "the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) cursed women who visit graves" (Tirmidhi, 3.371). But scholars say that the prohibition of women visiting graves was abrogated (mansukh) by the rigorously authenticated (sahih) hadith "I had forbidden you to visit graves, but now visit them" (Muslim, 2.672).
Here, although the expression "now visit them" (fa zuruha) is an imperative to men (or to a group of whom at least some are men), the fact that the hadith permits women as well as men to now visit graves is shown by another hadith related by Muslim in his Sahih that when ‘A'isha asked the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) what she should say if she visited graves, he told her, "Say: ‘Peace be upon the believers and Muslims of the folk of these abodes: May Allah have mercy on those of us who have gone ahead and those who have stayed behind: Allah willing, we shall certainly be joining you’" (Muslim, 2.671), which plainly entails the permissibility of her visiting graves in order to say this, for the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) would never have taught her these words if visiting the graves to say them had been disobedience.
Hence, the older ahadiths was abrogated by the newer one.
Wallahu Alim. Please do ask a local scholar before taking any of our words as final.
I did hear once that women cannot be present during a burial...
I never bothered to verify that , but I'm thinking you may be confusing VISITING a grave with the BURIAL of a human.
Can anyone shed some light about rules regarding burials?
I asked some people once about it and they said its because women cry too much during a burial, and because they create such a scene they're not allowed.
However, we all know THAT has some cultural bias in it...but I'm sure someone will pull up a hadith on it.