Salaam Guys,
About an hour ago i got this serious shocker of a news and quiet honestly i have no idea how to respond to this. We have these family friends that we know for the past 10 years now, khair they have 3 daughters and a son, khair i have been really good friends with the older daughter and she pretty much knew everything about me infact she was on good terms with my X as well, n e ways so after the breakup when i was in dubai we started being in touch regularly and i came back to canada and we occasionally started meeting up and talking, n e ways being a DESI i started kinda liking her and one fine day over a year ago i told her my feelings for her and the response was a nice rejection infact i found out that she likes somebody, that was said and done and we continued being friends and to be honest it felt like nothing happened, i mean i was a bit upset initially but everything was fine and nothing went sour between us, now around 3 weeks ago we were invited over to their place for dinner and apparently at that party my dad asked for her hand for me without telling me or consulting me and apparently her parents really like me and want her to marry me and thus are pressurizing her, now that i just found out from my mom i am now realising that she hasnt been in touch with me lately, and i thought it is holiday season and she would be bzz with .......
Now my problem is should i call her and clear it before i go out and refuse it totally so that she can be with who she likes, but that would ruin our family relationship, on the other hand if i dont say anything will that make her feel that i had somin to do with this and even if somehow she says yes she might hate me for life assuming it was my mastermind.
P.S even though i had nothing to do in this for some reason just knowing that her parents accept me and have been really excited at the prospect of me being their son in law it makes me really happy.
So she refused over a year ago.
How do you know if she will still refuse you?
She might have changed her mind now is what I mean.
her opinion does count and you need to make sure what is her feelings now.
Oh i see, you wrote they are pressurizing her.
Is that for a fact?
if so then leave her alone. Let her make decision without pressure.
If not for a fact then you need to proceed and inquire. Your dad did put you in difficult situation without consulting you I respectfully say.