**
How do the various titans of the computing industry describe a lowly glass of milk?
**
Optimist: The glass is half full.
Pessimist: The glass is half empty
Futurist: The milk’s in the wrong half of the glass
Pascal programmer: Well, what type of milk is it?
C Programmer: No thanks, I drink straight from the jug
Assembly programmer" No thanks; I drink straight from the cow
Basic Programmer: No thanks; I’m still breast feeding
MIS COBOL Programmer: I’LL DRINK IT IF YOU GIVE ME UNTIL NEXT YEAR
Fuzzy logic guy: I may or may not have drunk some part of that milk
Prolog Programmer: I know I drank it - just don’t ask me how
Non-Procedural Language Programmer: I drank it when nobody was looking
UI Designer: What’s that crap in my glass?
Pentium User: I drank (Glass * .49999999…) but don’t hold me to that
Windows User: Where’s my straw?
Mac User: Where’s my pump?
UNIX User: Nah… too easy
Multimedia author or Shareware game author: That glass is free; the next one you have to pay for
Security Consultant: Where’d the rest of the milk go?
CIA: What makes you think that’s milk???
NSA: We know what it really is
Copy Protection Crazies: Somebody drank half my milk and didn’t pay for it!
Free Software Foundation: The milk is the cow’s contribution to all mankind!
Bill Gates: Not enough market share to be Microsoft Milk™