upon my return to GS from exile over a couple of years, one of the most noticeable changes around here is the amazing shift in the gender ratio. previously there used to be very few girls on the forums, but now there seems to be something close to 20 girls to every guy on here. further probing reveals the source of this great bounty to be the life1 forum, where the gender ratio often approaches 65 to 1 in favor of the fairer sex.
being a professionally trained anthropologist with almost a decade of experience studying higher primate behavior out in the field, dr. queer shall attempt to explore this brand new exciting world in an objective and scientific fashion over the next few weeks, and tabulate his initial observations on this thread.
while there is lot to explore, it seems prudent to start with a rough classification of the inhabitants of the forum. so without much further ado, here are the proposed categories of organisms detected.
- The Bride
The unmistakable workhorse of life1. Relentless in its pursuit of the perfect wedding. Armed with a barrage of questions that no one with even a faint smudge of a Y chromosome would be capable of comprehending. Highly capable of distinguishing shades of color. Easily panicked.
- The Have-been
Used to be a bride. Isn’t as frequent a poster as used to be. Mostly doles out a sympathetic ear to the Bride, but is usually seen trying to figure out what the hell happened after that one day of basking in glory. Liable to wander into the parenting forum and never make it back to Life1.
- The To-be
The future Bride. Usually about 20 years old. Knows everything about weddings. Even knows what kind of a man she needs (or so she thinks). Their precociousness can be very entertaining. Especially in situations of conflict with the Have-beens.
- The Pseudo-troll
The one who asks a lot of really dumb questions that makes you wonder if the person is for real. And tragically enough, yes.
- The Troll
The one who posts threads for the sole purpose of rousing rage among the first three categories. They have it easy though with all the feed thrown their way.
- The Advisor
Knows everything about anything, and then some more. If you and your ex gf’s sister, who is also your wife’s best friend, fell into a blackhole in the vicinity of beta centauri while shopping for a Prada handbag, and wanted to know what to do next, this is the person to ask. he/she will give you a “sensible” answer in 2 minutes flat.
- The Clueless
This person replies diligently to every single one of the pseudo-troll as well the trolls posts. Runs simulations of possible outcomes and corner-case scenarios, produces oodles of emotion riddled posts. Has never been in a room alone with the opposite sex. Has watched 350 bollywood movies in the last 12 months.
- The Manipulator
Opens threads asking for relationship advice everytime someone pisses him/her off. Only, the villain the relationship scenario is always the person who dared mess with the manipulator. Clueless folks rip the poor poor villain to bits in a feeding frenzy.
As for which members fall into what categories, the catalog is available via PM. That is all for this week, folks. Happy trails.
awesome analysis.